Some today argue that schools are no longer necessary because children can learn so much from the internet and be educated at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is firmly acknowledged that children do not depend on schools to learn anymore,
instead
they can be educated via the Internet at home. In
this
essay, I will argue that the
world wide web
Correct your spelling
World Wide Web
show examples
has paved the way for online learning to the extent that school education has become irrelevant for the younger generation because the online learning system is not only more convenient for children to learn with but
also
provided scholars with better and more efficient tools to improve. One of the main arguments in favour of utilizing the internet as a mean of education is that online materials either live or on-demand
are
Verb problem
make it
show examples
easier for trainees to adjust their learning pace .
This
is because by consuming the web for learning, a considerable amount of time would be saved that
otherwise
would be wasted commuting to school premises.
This
extra time could be a driving force for improvement in learning by revising the materials or going through the videos again.
For instance
, Adobe Connect, which is an online platform for conducting live lessons, suggested that during the
covid-19
Correct your spelling
COVID-19
show examples
pandemic era and the widespread use of these online platforms, the average grade of students in the United States has improved moderately.
Hence
, the web could be employed as an efficient tool for improving students
due to
the fact that
this
is more convenient for pupils with any learning pace.
Moreover
, over the
last
couple of years, online training websites have developed significantly resulting in the emergence of online equipment that has revolutionized the schooling system altogether. These tools
are enabling
Wrong verb form
enable
show examples
teachers to supervise the progress of each tutee separately and ensure making recommendations based on each individual's situation. Teachable,
for example
, is a website for online learning, in which an embedded Artificial intelligence assesses the performance of every student in a class by taking into account the time spent on the platform, their performance on tests, etc.
By contrast
, in a conventional classroom, a teacher is not able to make an evaluation of each student and can solely pay attention to the
overall
results.
To conclude
, I would argue that Internet learning is superior to the conventional education system as it facilitates the training process for pupils
as well as
gives additional capabilities for better learning.
Submitted by sajadtorab on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Your essay exhibits good logical structure with a clear introduction and conclusion. Your main points are well-supported and the essay flows coherently. However, make sure to address all parts of the question thoroughly.
task achievement
Your essay presents clear and comprehensive ideas and uses relevant specific examples to support them. However, ensure that you address all aspects of the given question to a greater extent.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: