It is often thought that the increase in juveniles crime can be attributed to violence in social media. Do you agree that this is the main cause of juvenile crime? What solution can you offer to deal with this situation.
It is undeniable that social
media
is giving a great influence on youth these days. Some people claim that the main reason for recent crime by young people is easy access to violent content
. This
essay will address my thought on this
topic and a possible solution to resolve this
issue.
I firmly believe that uncensored and violent videos which you could find easily on Internet made juveniles commit crimes. Wondering and having curiosity about intense fights are human nature. However
, advanced technology creates an environment where young people can share these fight videos without learning these behaviours are morally wrong. Moreover
, the fact that this
type of inappropriate content
can bring a lot of attention on social media
makes children want to create this
content
and post it themself. Recent research about kids in juvenile jail is well-shown that how social media
affect young criminals. Most of them in juvenile jail stated that they have experienced addiction to intense content
or attempted to film fight videos because they wanted to be noticeable in the online world.
It is clear that
the Internet is affecting children deeply in a negative way. However
, creating regulations on social media
can be a way to prevent this
problem to happen. Companies which are providing these platforms are responsible for creating a safe online space. For example
, Twitter added a new feature that if there is a violent or harmful post, it will show a warning sign to everyone seeing the post. In Korea, there is an article that this
regulation helped to decrease the crime rate.
To conclude
, social media
is playing a harmful role in society by encouraging juvenile crime but safely regulated online can be a possible remedy for this
phenomenon.Submitted by dayoung000929 on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite