the diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane

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The diagram illustrates the

procession

Replace the word

process

show examples

of producing

sugar

Use synonyms

from

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

sugar

Use synonyms

cane.

Overall

Linking Words

, to turn the

sugar

Use synonyms

cane into

sugar

Use synonyms

, we have to do 7 different steps. Starting by growing the

sugar

Use synonyms

canes

Fix the agreement mistake

cane

show examples

and ending up with drying and cooling the

sugar

Use synonyms

crystals to become

sugar

Use synonyms

Firstly

Linking Words

, we have to grow the

sugar

Use synonyms

canes

Fix the agreement mistake

cane

show examples

This

Linking Words

process usually

take

Change the verb form

takes

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around 12 to 18

monts

Correct your spelling

months

. After the

sugar

Use synonyms

cane matured, enough to be harvested, they can be collected

Change preposition

show examples

diffent

Correct your spelling

different

ways. One way is collected

sugar

Use synonyms

canes

Use synonyms

manually by people, one is collected by machines. After being harvested, the

sugar

Use synonyms

canes

Fix the agreement mistake

cane

show examples

will be crushed by

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

special

mechines

Correct your spelling

machines

machine

to become the liquid form (juice).

Secondly

Linking Words

, after getting the juice, we have to purify it

Change preposition

with

show examples

a limestone filter. Once it

Change the verb form

show examples

purify

Wrong verb form

purified

show examples

the juice will be evaporated to become the syrup form.

then

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

form

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

to be

manufatured

Correct your spelling

manufactured

centrifuge

Correct article usage

a centrifuge

show examples

mechine

Correct your spelling

machine

which will

seperate

Correct your spelling

separate

the

sugar

Use synonyms

crystals from the syrup. The

last

Linking Words

stage to become

sugar

Use synonyms

is drying and cooling the collected

sugar

Use synonyms

crystals which are

seperated

Correct your spelling

separated

by the centrifuge.

vuhien4397Mon Aug 21 2023

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words sugar, canes with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

▼

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

180 words

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the diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane

Some children spend hours everyday on their smartphones. What is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative developmnet?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Education should be accessible to people of all economic background. All level of education from primary school to tertiary education should be free. To what extent do you agree with this opinion.

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?