Some people believe that our happiness depends on how much money we have. Others say that ‘money cannot buy happiness’. Do you think that having money is the key to happiness, or are there more important factors?
Nowadays,
people
believe that money
can bring happiness
but others think money
is not everything, there are many things that can not be brought by money
. Personally, I believe that money
is very important and it can not completely bring people
happiness
Admittedly, Happiness
depends on how much money
people
have. First,
Having money
can help people
not worry about academic training level and tuition fees. For example
, wealthy families have enough conditions to send their children to the top school. Second,
having a lot of money
helps people
relax and feel happy by paying for various activities like travelling, hanging out with friends or shopping.
Besides
, some important factors are the key to happiness
. The most typical is relationship, almost all research already found that the most important factor leading to happiness
is quality relationships. Quality relationships with our family, friend or darling help to share feelings,
and overcome difficulties. Positive relationships will make life better. Remove the comma
apply
In addition
, health is also
the key to happiness
. Life without health means nothing, can not perform their daily activities.
In conclusion, money
is very important, it is key to happiness
but money
can not completely bring people
happiness
. Besides
money
, there are many other things that bring happiness
.Submitted by ieltsamiedu on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite