IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

More and more people (readers, watchers, viewers) no longer read newspapers or watch TV programs to get news (events, information, tidings, reports) (report). They get news about the world through the internet. Is this a positive or negative development?

#people #readers #watchers #viewers #newspapers #tv #programs #news #events #information #tidings #reports #report #world #internet #development
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There is a trend in many countries that newspapers and TV programs were replaced by the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 because of technological development. In the following paragraphs, I am going to explain why it is a positive innovation. First and foremost, tidings include entertainment, sports, and social events locally and internationally, and
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
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provides
Correct subject-verb agreement
provide
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 important and new knowledge for us. It can be seen that today more and more global media companies develop their own apps, and watchers can gain information more conveniently on their phones or computers.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, online readers can spend less time sharing interesting or urgent events with others who live in other nations.
Besides
Linking Words
, each person can save a lot of time buying a foreign newspaper.
Secondly
Linking Words
, on TV channels, watchers can only receive some specific information, but they do not have opportunities to watch other topics.
However
Linking Words
, if they opened their phones and
googled
Capitalize word
Googled
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 other subjects, they could have more choices.
Besides
Linking Words
, under
the
Correct article usage
apply
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online news websites, they can see other viewers’ comments and discuss
with
Correct pronoun usage
them with
show examples
 them.
Moreover
Linking Words
, connecting with different
countries’
Change noun form
countries
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 people
becomes
Wrong verb form
become
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 easier than before because everyone can see many global reports through numerous apps.
That is
Linking Words
 to say, these people can even build a relationship with other cultures' readers. In conclusion, online media includes different states’ news which helps us gain more knowledge globally, and each person can spend less time purchasing the papers. Because of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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internet innovation, the gap between nations
is shorten
Change the verb form
is shortened
is shortening
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, and it
also
Linking Words
 promotes globalization more successfully.
Submitted by annie5342586 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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