One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is learning a foreign language at primary school is better compared to secondary school.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Learning the difference between

right

Use synonyms

and wrong is a key part of a child’s development. Some people believe that

punishment

Use synonyms

is necessary to help

children

Use synonyms

understand

this

Linking Words

distinction.

While

Linking Words

I agree that

children

Use synonyms

should learn good

Use synonyms

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

at an early age, I believe that

punishment

Use synonyms

must be used carefully and in a positive way.

To begin

Linking Words

with, teaching

children

Use synonyms

right

Use synonyms

and wrong from a young age is very important because it shapes their future actions. If

children

Use synonyms

do not understand proper

Use synonyms

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

early on, they may develop bad habits that are difficult to change later.

For example

Linking Words

, if a child lies or steals and no one corrects them, they might think

such

Linking Words

actions are acceptable.

Therefore

Linking Words

, it is the responsibility of parents and teachers to guide

children

Use synonyms

in the

right

Use synonyms

direction.

However

Linking Words

, I do not fully agree that

punishment

Use synonyms

is always the best method to teach good

Use synonyms

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

. Harsh punishments can harm a child’s mental health and lead to fear or resentment.

Instead

Linking Words

, parents and teachers should use positive reinforcement, like praise or rewards, when a child behaves well. If

punishment

Use synonyms

is necessary, it should be mild and aimed at teaching, not hurting.

For instance

Linking Words

, taking away privileges like screen time or asking the child to apologize for their actions can be effective. In conclusion,

children

Use synonyms

must learn the difference between

right

Use synonyms

and wrong early in life.

While

Linking Words

punishment

Use synonyms

can sometimes help teach

this

Linking Words

, it should always be fair and constructive. Parents and teachers should focus on positive methods to guide

children

Use synonyms

toward good

Use synonyms

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

and avoid using harsh or harmful punishments.

dnm.bestSat Aug 26 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

While the essay provides a comprehensive response to the prompt, consider enhancing your argument by exploring counterarguments. Addressing possible objections to your stance can make your essay more robust.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next. While your essay is coherent, a few more linking phrases could enhance the flow between ideas.

task achievement

The essay effectively presents a balanced view on the topic with clear reasoning.

coherence and cohesion

The logical structure of the essay is solid with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion, making it easy to follow.

coherence and cohesion

The examples provided, such as the potential consequences of uncorrected bad behavior and mild punishment methods, are relevant and help clarify your points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

262 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
You are moving to a new country to go to university and will need a part - time job . You have a friend who lives in that country . Write a letter to your friend . In your letter , apologise for not staying in touch explain why you're moving to this country ask your friend if he / she can help you find a job .
Hello MR Osama , I hope you are doing well . I am finally moved to here and I am going to study in university.
6
band
Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
There is a growing recognition of the importance of music in our lives. Some even argue that music is a powerful medium to unite people belonging to diverse cultures and age groups. While this might be considered as an exaggeration, I completely agree with this point of view.
8
band
In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative situation?
Owing a house is more crucial than renting in some parts of the world. This essay will explicate the reasons behind it followed by the view that it is definitely a positive trend.
7
band
Some people say that economic growth is the only way to end hunger and poverty, while others say that economic growth is damaging the environment so it must be stopped. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Some people state if people want to solve the problems of the poor and the famine, they have to make the economy prosperous. However, other humans indicate developing the economy brings defilement to the environment. Arguably, the economic growth has various effects on humanity and the surroundings. I think it is difficult to assert whether " Economic growth" is beneficial for human beings or not.
8.5
band
You recently stayed in a hotel in a large city. The weather was very unusual for the time of year and the heating / cooling system in the hotel was quite inadequate. Write a letter to the manager of the hotel. In your letter: give details of what went wrong explain what you had to do to overcome the problem at the time say what action you would like the manager to take
I am writing to express my dissatisfaction during my stay at your hotel "The Diamond Villa".

One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is learning a foreign language at primary school is better compared to secondary school.

Your opinion

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative situation?

Some people say that economic growth is the only way to end hunger and poverty, while others say that economic growth is damaging the environment so it must be stopped. Discuss both views and give your opinion.