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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that people should be given the right to use freshwater as they like. Others believe governments should tightly control the use of freshwater. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #right #governments #control
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It is widely recognized that the
usage
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 of freshwater should aim for the betterment of residents’
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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.
While
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 some hold the view that the government should permit citizens to freely
use
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 freshwater, others suppose that
this
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 kind of
water
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 had better be strictly managed.
This
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 essay will analyze how unwise it is to let people
use
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 freshwater as they like before pointing out the merits of the control of freshwater. On the one hand, it is understandable why some people enjoy using freshwater regardless of
government’s
Correct article usage
the government’s
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 management. The key rationale is the general public loves having
freedom
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the freedom
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 to
use
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 clean
water
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 as a provision
to
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for
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 daily activities. It is undeniable that wealthy families would prefer
this
Linking Words
 clean
water
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usage
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 which is not under any control, since they have a great deal of money to pay for that. Especially, swimming, food and restaurant businesses share the same interest in the freedom to
use
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 freshwater because it is beneficial for their working purposes.
However
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,
such
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 permission is short-sighted since the government may inadvertently allow people to waste freshwater, which is a valuable source with only 5% of the total amount of
water
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 coming from various types.
This
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 is a testament to how using clean
water
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 without any management can be a threat to the existence of freshwater.
On the other hand
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, leaders of a country should make a freshwater
law
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 come into force because of
some
Correct determiner usage
the
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 following reasons. First and foremost, it may guarantee that every household has clean
water
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 to
use
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. Since the action of freely using clean
water
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 probably makes houses which
locate
Wrong verb form
located
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 far away from the source of
water
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 have fewer chances to collect
water
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,
so
Correct word choice
apply
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having a
law
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 on
water
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usage
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 will help these unfortunate homes. Another worth-noting point is clean
water
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 should not be wasted. It is a fact that many African nations have suffered from the shortage of
water
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use
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, enforcing a freshwater
law
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 means that we can join hands to save these nations. In conclusion,
although
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 letting individuals
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
use
Use synonyms
 fresh
water
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 as much as they like is not without its compelling arguments, I would contend that strict
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law
Fix the agreement mistake
laws
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 related to the
usage
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 of clean
water
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 should be established by the government because of the prevention of
wasting
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waste
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 and the contribution to help poor countries.
Submitted by ngocthuykatie on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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