IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and amount of time spent doing housework in households in one country between 1920 and 2019.

The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and amount of time spent doing housework in households in one country between 1920 and 2019.
#show #changes #ownership #appliances #amount #time #housework #households #country
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The
fisrt
Correct your spelling
first
 chart shows us how much percentage does
people
Use synonyms
use
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
 electrical appliances
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
housework
Use synonyms
 between 1920 to 2019.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the second chart shows us how many
hours
Use synonyms
does
Change the verb form
do
show examples
people
Use synonyms
spent
Change the verb form
spend
show examples
 on
housework
Use synonyms
everyweek
Correct your spelling
every week
. All the percentage of
Add an article
the household
a household
show examples
household
Fix the agreement mistake
households
show examples
 which
using
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
electrical
Add an article
the electrical
show examples
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 had
increasely
Correct your spelling
increased
increasingly
 tendency in almost 100
years
Use synonyms
. Only
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
 1960 to 1980
decreasment
Correct your spelling
decrease
tempeporly
Correct your spelling
Temperley
. In 1980, doing household with
refrigerator
Correct article usage
a refrigerator
show examples
 had
attached
Verb problem
apply
show examples
100
Use synonyms
percentages
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
 and 20
years
Use synonyms
 later doing chores with
vacuum
Correct article usage
a vacuum
show examples
 cleaner
also
Linking Words
 attached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
100
Use synonyms
percentages
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
 and 70
Use synonyms
percentages
Correct your spelling
per cent of
show examples
people
Use synonyms
using
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
 washing
machine
Fix the agreement mistake
machines
show examples
 to do
housework
Use synonyms
.
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
,Moreover
show examples
 the
numebrs
Correct your spelling
numbers
number
 of
people
Use synonyms
 spent on doing
housework
Use synonyms
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
constanrly
Correct your spelling
constantly
decreased
Wrong verb form
decreasing
show examples
. It dropped off almost 40
hours
Use synonyms
 per week in almost 100
years
Use synonyms
. Because
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Use synonyms
percentages
Fix the agreement mistake
percentage
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
 using most
electrically
Change the word
electrical
show examples
 appliances
get
Verb problem
was
show examples
 100 in 1980 and 2000 the line got more flat
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
 1980 to 2019 rather than the line in the past 60
years
Use synonyms
. Maybe if the washing machine
get
Change the verb form
gets
show examples
 100
Use synonyms
percentages
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
use
Verb problem
apply
show examples
the number of
hours
Use synonyms
using
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
 on
housework
Use synonyms
 can
less
Add a missing verb
be less
show examples
 than 10
hours
Use synonyms
 a week.
Submitted by yao20010210 on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, housework, hours, years, percentages with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 7 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • electrical appliances
  • housework
  • time frame
  • variables
  • trends
  • significant milestones
  • turning points
  • correlation
  • reduction
  • influenced
  • societal implications
  • quality of life
  • gender roles
  • economic implications
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