IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people think eating meat is bad for health. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #meat #health
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Certain individuals consider that consuming
meat
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 is detrimental to our body, I strongly disagree with
this
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 idea since having
meat
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 in our daily
diet
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 can provide various pros to our health.
To begin
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 with, having no
meat
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 in our
diet
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 will lead to a lack of essential
nutrients
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.
For instance
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,
meat
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 is an integral portion of several elements
such
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 as zinc, vitamins, and
protein
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. Without absorbing these kinds of
nutrients
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, our
diet
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 might lose its balance in
this
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 process, causing malnutrition
subsequently
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.
As a result
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, our physical condition may emerge with certain concerns like an unenergetic mental state and anaemia caused by lack of consumption of
meat
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.
On the other hand
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, consuming
meat
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 and controlling our intake of
nutrients
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 properly can visibly improve our muscle strength. It is widely acknowledged that muscles are primarily made up of a big portion of
protein
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 except for the other allied
nutrients
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. Since a large amount of
protein
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 contributes to
meat
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, consuming
meat
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 in our daily
diet
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 can appropriately make our body get more
protein
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,
hence
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,
this
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 way, it is beneficial to people who are carrying their physical training, considering they are all inclined to reinforce their muscle mass and build up their desired curves. To put it in a nutshell,
although
Linking Words
 the opponents argue that eating
meat
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 is harmful to our physical condition, it is undeniable that consuming sufficient
meat
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 can enhance our body mass and avert different types of ailments caused by malnutrition. In terms of that, I will assertively oppose the topic.
Submitted by s0210116 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Try to maintain stronger logical transitions and connections between ideas.
Lexical Resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas more precisely.
Task Achievement
In the conclusion, reflect more specifically on the discussed points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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