Development in technology causes envionmental problems. Some people believe the solution in these problems is everyone accepts asimpler way of lfe, while others say that technology can solve these problems. Discuss both views and glve your own opinion.

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Technology

Use synonyms

has made life much easier, but

unfortunately

Add a comma

,unfortunately

show examples

it has

also

Linking Words

made a devastating impact on the

environment

Use synonyms

While

Linking Words

some may think that the solution lies in abandoning

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

technology

Use synonyms

and living a

quitter

Correct your spelling

quieter

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life, others see that modern

machines

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are reliable on,

to solve

Change the verb form

solving

show examples

this

Linking Words

problem.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss both arguments and, in my opinion, I think that machinery can help in solving the environmental issue.

To begin

Linking Words

with, using

less

Change the quantifier

fewer

show examples

machines

Use synonyms

and depending on alternative sources to save the

environment

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is indeed a good choice.

Firstly

Linking Words

, if everyone used

less

Change the quantifier

fewer

show examples

cars

Use synonyms

and walked to work

instead

Linking Words

, it would improve the quality of the air.

As the

Correct word choice

The

show examples

amount of carbon emissions will decrease significantly and

subsequently

Linking Words

leads

Correct subject-verb agreement

lead

show examples

to cleaner air to breathe and an improved atmosphere.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, if factories depended on

less

Correct quantifier usage

fewer

show examples

gas-based

machines

Use synonyms

, it would

also

Linking Words

lower the pollution caused by those

machineries

Change the wording

machinery

types of machinery

pieces of machinery

show examples

For instance

Linking Words

, Egypt has established a law that

minimize

Change the verb form

minimizes

show examples

the usage of machinery and

depend

Change the verb form

depends

show examples

on alternative greener sources. To sum it up, it has been quite difficult to decrease the usage of

machines

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but it is in some

people

Change noun form

people's

show examples

opinion a good choice to save the

environment

Use synonyms

On the other hand

Linking Words

, some individuals think that the problem makers are the lifeline for solving it,

in other words

Linking Words

Machines

Use synonyms

can figure out how to save the

environment

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. Solar plants can harvest the sun’s energy and convert it to electricity that supplies all countries around the globe with clean energy,

therefore

Linking Words

, the fossil fuels which emit harmful gases will be redundant.

Linking Words

Also

Add a comma

,Also

show examples

electrical

Replace the word

electric

show examples

cars

Use synonyms

are great substituent for conventional

cars

Use synonyms

that pollute the atmosphere and it decreases the need for fossil fuels.

For example

Linking Words

Remove the article

apply

show examples

recent research shows that by 2030, carbon

emission

Fix the agreement mistake

emissions

show examples

will

decreases

Wrong verb form

decrease

show examples

by 80% owing to

electrical

Replace the word

electric

show examples

cars

Use synonyms

. To summarize, environmental

issue

Fix the agreement mistake

issues

show examples

can be solved with the assistance of

technology

Use synonyms

. In my opinion, modern techs can be used to help in coming up with solutions to save the

environment

Use synonyms

, it just

need

Change the verb form

needs

show examples

the proper guidance by humans and

creative

Replace the word

creativity

show examples

. In conclusion, it can be reiterated that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

techs have merits and demerits when it comes to

Use synonyms

environment

Add an article

the environment

show examples

, it depends more on

human

Add an article

the human

show examples

way of using the

technology

Use synonyms

. It can be used to save or to deteriorate the atmosphere.

islam_biologistThu Aug 31 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

375 words

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Obesity is becoming a major problem in many parts of the world, especially in rich countries. What are the reasons and solutions?

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Many people today are worried about young children using video games. What problems might these games cause for children and society as a whole? How could these problems be reduced?

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is that loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion