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Writing Samples
Band 6

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantage of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

#time #population #countries #adults #people #advantage #situation
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The proportion of elderly
people
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 to youngsters has been changing annually all over the world. There is currently a contentious argument over whether having a larger number of youths than ancestors would be beneficial. In my point of view, I completely agree with
this
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, and in
this
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 essay, I will support my opinion with examples. The first and foremost reason is our young blood is very energetic, bold, and innovative, as they can make revolutionary inventions.
For example
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, they have the mental and physical fitness to produce efficient
work
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.
Thus
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, the young mind can think faster than the old one as they are very fresh and active which has the capability to attain new
experience
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 and knowledge. Most company owners prefer to appoint teenagers or freshers to
work
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 in their company
due to
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 their full effort of
work
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.
Secondly
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, young
people
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 have the tendency to take risks and achieve their goals,
whereas
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 elderly
people
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 don't.
For instance
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, some factories and companies are still working
according to
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 the old-fashioned model
due to
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 not updating to the new trend. In
this
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 case, hiring a young one may help to produce new ideas to improve the company.
In contrast
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, having older
people
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 may be helpful
due to
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 their lifetime
experience
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, which can be beneficial in several ways. They can teach young ones through their
experience
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 to prevent them from danger. To sum it up, A high percentage of young may
helpful
Replace the word
help
show examples
 to produce full-force
work
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 and have the ability to take risks.
On the other hand
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, elderly
people
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 can assist things with their past
experience
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, which will be more beneficial for society.
Submitted by akmaljeely on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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