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Band 6

The use of mobile phone is as antisocial as smoking. Smoking is banned in certain places so mobile phone should be banned like smoking. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#phone #places
Nowadays, Technology has developed widely so it has become a crucial part of our day. Some people think that mobile
phones
 promote
sclusion
Correct your spelling
seclusion
inclusion
 behaviour and they should be banned in some regions. I firmly disagree with that notion. In recent years, humans and their
smart
Correct your spelling
smartphones
show examples
phones
 have become
inseperable
Correct your spelling
inseparable
, as they depend on mobiles in their daily tasks.
This
 is because
in
Add the comma(s)
,in
show examples
this
 technological era,
smart
Correct your spelling
smartphones
show examples
phones
 have made our lives easier. Starting from waking up and checking the clock, or e-mails to see if there are new messages from friends or work, to virtual
meeting
Fix the agreement mistake
meetings
show examples
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 home with clients or colleagues.
In addition
,
phones
 remind us
with
Change preposition
of
show examples
 essential appointments and tasks, that
human
Correct article usage
the human
show examples
 mind can
usally
Correct your spelling
usually
forgets
Change the verb form
forget
show examples
.
For instance
, in the middle of
this
fast paced
Add a hyphen
fast-paced
show examples
 life, normally important schedules can be overlooked, but with new applications like e-calendar, meetings can not be forgotten.
Moreover
,
screen
time
 on
smart
Correct your spelling
smartphones
show examples
phones
 can be limited, so it is not considered
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
antisocial behaviour.
Instead
 of banning it entirely. There are
application
Fix the agreement mistake
applications
show examples
 that monitor your
screen
time
, and if someone exceeded his daily
screen
 limit, the phone would close automatically for a certain
time
.
For example
, apps
such
 as
time observer
Correct your spelling
Time Observer
show examples
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 great for that purpose, you can set the
time
 you want to spend on the cellphone and if you reach that
time
, the
screen
 goes off. If people were allowed to spend limitless
time
 on their mobiles, it would have a devastating impact
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the long term. In conclusion, It can be reiterated that mobile
phones
 can be
addictive
Rephrase
as addictive
show examples
 as smoking, and some people think they should be banned from
a certain areas
Correct the article-noun agreement
certain areas
a certain area
show examples
. But it is not recommended to ban
smart
Correct your spelling
smartphones
show examples
phones
 as they form an essential part of our lives.
Instead
Add a comma
,Instead
show examples
 we can minimize the
time
 spent using it.
Submitted by islam_biologist on

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • antisocial
  • social interactions
  • negative impacts
  • banning
  • regulated
  • completely banned
  • education
  • awareness campaigns
  • responsible
  • mobile phone use
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