One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, the improving medical
system
Use synonyms
leads to longer lifespans and increasing life expectancy.
While
Linking Words
some
people
Use synonyms
doubt the drawbacks of the development, I believe it is a blessing rather than a curse. On the one hand, a better medical
system
Use synonyms
extends
people
Use synonyms
's lives. Compared to a few decades before, humans can live longer now.
However
Linking Words
, a longer lifespan leads to several problems.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the population of elder citizens will increase and the proportion of retired
people
Use synonyms
will become larger. The nation might face
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
difficulties
such
Linking Words
as a lack of labour population and the cost of the economic increase.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the funding for the younger generation will meet the potential decline since the government needs more money to take care of the elderly.
However
Linking Words
, these not something that cannot be solved. The government plays a vital role in setting up a complete social welfare
system
Use synonyms
which benefits every age group.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, most of the elderly hold a great passion to devote themselves to the
society
Use synonyms
. It is worth noticing that there is a large proportion of volunteers are elder
people
Use synonyms
. They are willing to spend most of their time on charities after their retirement. From hospitals to museums, these kinds of volunteers chain the whole
society
Use synonyms
together.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, because of the improving medical
system
Use synonyms
, the elderly can now remain healthy bodies and provide support to their families. Most of the grandparents back the parents up by helping to take care of their grandchildren and the households.
In other words
Linking Words
, the elderly are not only someone who help run
society
Use synonyms
but
also
Linking Words
our cherished family members. On the whole, the
aging
Change the spelling
ageing
show examples
society
Use synonyms
brings several concerns but because of the positive impact which was brought
from
Change preposition
by
show examples
the elderlies, I indicate that the advantages of the improving medical
system
Use synonyms
outweigh the disadvantages.
Consequently
Linking Words
, the development makes our future completely bright.
Submitted by BeckyJ on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • life expectancy
  • elderly population
  • health care systems
  • pension funds
  • extended family relationships
  • quality of life
  • aging population
  • economic growth
  • volunteer work
  • expertise
  • financial planning
  • retirement
  • age-related diseases
  • medical research
  • healthier lifestyles
What to do next:
Look at other essays: