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Band 5

Many feel that going to the gym is the best way to stay fit. Others think there are more effective methods. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#gym #methods
Some
people
 think that joining a
gym
 would be the most efficient
way
 to keep fit. Others,
however
, believe that there are still some
exercises
 that can benefit
people
 to have a relatively nice body.
This
 writer will argue both sides and give a conclusion
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the latter. It can be certain that working out in the
gym
 is helpful for
people
 who want to have a well-standard body shape.
This
 is because they have to follow a harsh diet relating to measuring calories in every meal in order to ensure that they consume
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
enough amount of protein and
carbohydrate
Fix the agreement mistake
carbohydrates
show examples
.
Moreover
, the
exercises
 in the
gym
 focus on building muscles and burning fat,
hence
, it will help the community joining a
gym
 see a distinct difference after months of working out and assist
people
 to stay in the perfect shape for a long time. In fact, in the modern world
nowadays
Rephrase
apply
show examples
, the constant increase of
people
 joining a
gym
 could show how effective the
exercises
 are. Despite the fact that going to the
gym
 is considered the most popular
way
 to stay fit, other
exercises
such
 as doing sports can give the inhabitants the same result. First of all, not all
people
 define staying fit as having a tiny waist or six packs, they believe that not getting
obesity
Replace the word
obese
show examples
 or lacking nutrition can
also
 be considered as keeping fit.
Therefore
,
people
 just need a healthy diet and
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
regular exercise to enhance their physical and mental health.
On the other hand
, playing a specific sport
such
 as volleyball or badminton could benefit
people
 to stay in
desired
Change the article
the desired
show examples
 shape. Many athletes around the world have a well-standard body without joining a
gym
 or having a strict diet. In conclusion, we could choose whether
going
Change the verb form
to go
show examples
 to a
gym
 or
doing
Wrong verb form
do
show examples
 other
exercises
 to remain fit. I assume that
gym
Correct article usage
a gym
show examples
 can be
regard
Change the form of the verb
regarded
show examples
 as the fastest
way
 to keep fit, but not the only
way
 to maintain fitness and healthy

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Physical well-being
  • prime option
  • structured exercise routines
  • professional equipment
  • fostering an environment
  • motivation and discipline
  • counter-argument
  • outdoor activities
  • home workouts
  • cost-effectiveness
  • social and emotional satisfaction
  • team sports
  • hybrid approach
  • holistic approach
  • comprehensive benefits
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