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Band 6

Tourism is an ever-growing industry. what benefit do you think tourism brings to individuals and society?

#tourism #industry #benefit #individuals #society
It is admittedly true that
tourism
 is
Correct article usage
a statistic
show examples
statistic
Replace the word
statistical
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 industry for most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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nations but the
tourism
 sector is the main income for lots of countries
such
 as the UAE, Qatar, and Saudi Arabia. In
this
 essay, I will elaborate on my point of view,
how
Change preposition
on how
show examples
 individuals and
society
 benefit from
tourism
. On the one hand,
tourism
Add an article
the tourism
show examples
 sector is a profitable business for a nation. It not only help a country's GDP but
also
 give opportunity for new jobs for
society
.
However
, The UAE is a successful example for
tourism
Correct article usage
the tourism
show examples
sectors
Fix the agreement mistake
sector
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, where continuously GDP growing only for visitors.
As a result
, most
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
visitors stay
4
Change preposition
for 4
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- 5 days, where they spend
minimum
Add an article
a minimum
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 of 10000-10,000 USD. Not only products have an extra tax for
tourism
 but
also
 food.
On the other hand
,
society
 and
people
 benefit from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sectors
such
 as local
people
's shops, restaurants and hotels, where visitors visit most of the time and buy products. Other side,
society
's individuals
able
Add a missing verb
are able
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 to invest money because they benefit from
tourism
 and they are
open
Wrong verb form
opening
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 new organizations that help to create new jobs for
society
people
.
Secondly
, the
tourism
 sector helps a
society
 of poverty, where
people
 are able to good livelihood.
Day
 by
day
 crime rate has decreased because of new job opportunities for
society
people
.
To sum up
,
day
 by
day
 most Middle Eastern countries are inspiring other countries to improve
tourism
sectors
.
Tourism
sectors
 boost a country's GDP which helps to develop a good
society
 and new social opportunities.
Submitted by muhammadnaim194196 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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