People spend less time at home than they used to. What are the reasons for this change and what are effects on society and individuals.
Nowadays, people tend to spend their time out of
home
more than before. It seems that a lack of enough entertainment and too much work would be the most crucial factors of this
happening.
Firstly
, when people can not find enough hobbies in their own house, it makes them find them in other places. For example
, they prefer to go out with their friends to watch movies or theatre whenever it is not possible at home
. Secondly
, it seems evident that less time at home
principally stems from the hectic schedules of each age group. It means that,
members of families work too much in order to fulfil their needs, Remove the comma
apply
therefore
, they have to stay at the workplace until midnight. It can be up to eight hours at workplaces and even increases because of the extra hour. For instance
, for making a life some people work two shifts each day.
As a consequence
of this
issue, family correlation is going to be lost day by day and families will lose their own close bones which used to have. In ,addition it creates distance between members and consequently
, they forget their roles among their relatives. In addition
,because of a shortage of energy, when they arrive home
they are not able to support their own family members in fact it makes them bored.
In conclusion, it is an important issue which can not be ignored , especially because it enables them to get together at home
. totally, lack of that has a detrimental effect after a long eraSubmitted by rezasepas1367 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a clear and coherent structure, resulting in a confusing presentation of ideas. More focus on organizing the content is necessary.
task achievement
The response partially addresses the task, but lacks depth and clarity in presenting and supporting ideas. More specific examples and a deeper exploration of the topic are needed.