One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
These days, there are few people who believe that
due to
the presence of modern-era health care , facility deaths have decreased considerably and human lives are extended. This
essay will cover both views in detail. In my opinion, the pros definitely outweigh the cons due to
the fact that it makes a plethora of options available such
as access to ancient knowledge and living with loved ones.
To begin
with, firstly
, the significant merit of this
is, that it aids us in tapping the knowledge of the greatest discoveries which have gone extinct unfortunately. Secondly
, scientists and inventors due to
the fact of have longer life can accomplish their research. For instance
, Telsa who initiated the invention of wireless electricity was almost on the verge of finishing it. However
, due to
his ,illness
he could not finish it .It could have been a boon to the present generation. So, it would be beneficial if age can be increased.
Add a comma
illness,
On the other hand
, the foremost demerit of this
is competition in various things like food, space and opportunities. Hereafter, there are famines already occurring around the world due to
the existing pollution by means of generating greenhouse gases through a variety of methodologies and the excess humanity would only make it worse. To illustrate it, China which has people living longer have turned out to be a burden to their society as they would require extreme care in terms of medication. Furthermore
, this
only resulted in higher expenses and did not yield any benefits for them. Thus
, making their economy worse.
In conclusion, subsequently
there are multiple advantages of good treatments by various means. When planned with efficient strategies Add a comma
subsequently,
this
could actually pave the path for the betterment of communities.Submitted by melmurihashir on
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Task Achievement
The essay addresses the given prompt and provides a balanced view of the topic. However, it would benefit from providing a stronger emphasis on the advantages and disadvantages of increased life expectancy.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay demonstrates a logical structure, with separate paragraphs discussing the advantages and disadvantages of increased life expectancy. However, the organization of ideas within each paragraph could be improved for clearer coherence and cohesion.
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