Schools should use films, computers and games instead of books. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In recent years, there has been a growing debate about education methods. Some opine that studying through entertainment has numerous benefits for students than reading books,

although

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others argue that

such

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a trend brings potential downsides. Personally, I believe that the advantages of learning from

media

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far outweigh the drawbacks. To commence, encouraging colleges to teach by using various

media

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offers several benefits to their pupils.

Firstly

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this

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approach will bring the attention of children to focus on their class, allowing the youth to absorb a variety of information during learning.

As a result

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, the young may cultivate a lot more

knowledge

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when compared with reading textbooks.

Moreover

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, because of how interesting the

media

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is, it generates discussion between learners, sharing individuals’ viewpoints.

For example

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, certain schools in the USA let their adolescents play a game in order to gain programming

knowledge

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Hence

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, they can practice critical thinking skills and discuss with their friends when they face difficult challenges.

On the other hand

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, exploring

knowledge

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through games or movies may,

however

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, lead to some disadvantages.

Due to

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such

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media

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being made for entertainment, filmmakers or game developers need to cut off or change some information from the storyline to prevent the audience from feeling bored.

This

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gives rise to losing some details

while

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collecting

knowledge

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Consequently

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, pupils may have less deepen understanding in that field.

For example

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, the movie is related to World War II, but they change a little information about the biography of Hitler.

This

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brings about a misunderstanding of Hitler’s history. In conclusion,

while

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those who disagree with some institutions use

media

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as a tool to educate, in my opinion, I strongly concur with

this

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solution as it lets the young enjoy grasping

knowledge

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through their experience.

This

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will encourage the students to not only gain

knowledge

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Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

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be more interact with that experience and memorize more data

while

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learning, which the traditional approach cannot provide.

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coherence cohesion

The essay has a logical structure and is quite well-organized. Each paragraph has a clear single purpose. However, some sentences could be structured more clearly - particularly when transitioning between ideas or points. This way, the ideas can be expressed more effectively.

task achievement

The writer has displayed a capacity to provide a complete argument, covering aspects of both agreement and disagreement. Points raised, however, are predominantly general. Providing additional concrete examples would give more weight to the argument and demonstrate a deeper understanding of the subject.

lexical resource

Introduce a wider range of language, particularly more nuanced vocabulary, to express your points more effectively. You have demonstrated a decent understanding and control of vocabulary, but there are instances where you could have better demonstrated your lexical resource by using more academic language.

grammatical range and accuracy

The essay is largely grammatically correct, but watch out for the occasional preposition error and awkward phrasing. For example, 'more interact with that experience' should probably be 'more interactive with that experience' or 'more engaged in that experience'.

14
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

320 words

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Schools should use films, computers and games instead of books. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that tha government is wasting money on tha art and that this money could be better spend elsewhere. To what extent do you agree with this view?

Some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects, especially at the primary level. Do you agree or disagree?

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

It is often said that we should work to live, not live to work. Discuss both points of view and give your own opinion.

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, howeve, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both views and give your opinion.