IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people think that newspapers are the best way to get news. However, others believe that they can get news better through another media platform. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #newspapers #news #media #platform
In
this
 concurrent world, it is widely believed that newspapers are the best way to get
news
.
Nevertheless
, I quibble
from
Change preposition
with
show examples
 them and propound that global
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
 can get
news
 faster and better via
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
media
platform
Fix the agreement mistake
platforms
show examples
such
 as Facebook or Instagram.
This
 essay will
further
 throw light upon in my upcoming paragraph, after which I will lead to a logical conclusion. There
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 adequate
proofs
Fix the agreement mistake
proof
show examples
 of
this
 view
that
Change preposition
of
show examples
sustainable
Replace the word
sustainability
show examples
. The top-notch reason is with the development of technology in
recently
Change the word
recent
show examples
 years,
people
 around the world tend to use their
smart phone
Correct your spelling
smartphones
show examples
 day by day
access
Fix the infinitive
to access
show examples
 the internet to get
information
 that they need or the
news
 through social
media
platform
Fix the agreement mistake
platforms
show examples
. Take the generation in
this
 decade as an example, they tend to get
information
 via social
media
platform
Fix the agreement mistake
platforms
show examples
 rather than read a whole article, in light of
fact
Add an article
the fact
show examples
 that social
media
 can
summary
Replace the word
summarise
show examples
 the main idea of the
news
 and they find it more interesting than
the read
Wrong verb form
reading
show examples
 a newspaper.
In addition
, they can
also
 show off their own
view point
Correct your spelling
viewpoint
show examples
 about the topic or can see what another individual
think
Correct subject-verb agreement
thinks
show examples
 about it, and enhance their perspective about the topic.
On the contrary
, I reiterate there are a plethora of strong factors supporting
people
 can get
information
 through social
media
platform
Fix the agreement mistake
platforms
show examples
. Meanwhile,
get
Wrong verb form
getting
show examples
news
 from
newspaper
Add an article
the newspaper
show examples
 cannot be overshadowed either.
Thus
,
people
 in
general
Correct article usage
the general
show examples
 public tend to distinguish
read
Wrong verb form
reading
show examples
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
show examples
is
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
 the best way to get
news
, which has
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
various reasons. To commerce, it is deemed that
read
Wrong verb form
reading
show examples
 a whole article can help
people
 get exactly
information
Correct article usage
the information
show examples
.
Moreover
, an interesting point that goes with
this
 is they can improve their social knowledge.
Nonetheless
,
people
 in
this
 century like
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
gen
Capitalize word
Gen
show examples
 Z
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
think it will waste a lot of time to read a
fully
Change the word
full
show examples
 one.
To sum up
,
although
 both views certainly have some validity, it seems to me
that is
 better to get
information
 through social
media
platform
Fix the agreement mistake
platforms
show examples
.
Submitted by huong.bx on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • news consumption
  • editorial standards
  • reliable
  • tactile experience
  • ritualistic
  • in-depth analysis
  • immediate
  • breaking news
  • tailor newsfeeds
  • misinformation
  • fact-checking
  • environmental impact
  • digital carbon footprint
What to do next:
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