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Nowadays, most countries improve the standard of living through economic development. But some social values are lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of the phenomenon outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #development #values #phenomenon
It is debatable whether economic
development
 empowers society for the good or
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
loosens the attachment of community. Despite the strong opinion stating that spiritual and emotional values will be lost in the rise of the
economy
, I surely believe that within the era of innovation and
development
,
people
 will benefit from it one way or another.
To begin
 with, there are tons of opportunities for improvement that come
along with
 the growth of the
economy
.
People
’s lives are enriched through many aspects
such
 as education, health, and hospitality.
For instance
, more capital can be invested in building public schools, applying more advanced technologies in treating patients, and upgrading customer services and facilities in the service industry.
Moreover
,
this
also
 means that the funds for cultural conservation will be widened, helping preserve historical places and cultural heritage.
In contrast
, the main reason for the negativity towards economic growth is its consequences of creating materialism and individualism. In order to endure the
development
 of the
economy
,
people
 have to work hard to make more money, the more money transactions being made, the greater impact it will have on the
economy
.
However
,
this
 creates a “9 to 5” working habit which exhausts workers and
also
 limits the time for individuals to enjoy social life.
Therefore
, with hard-earned currency,
people
 tend to be more selfish with material values and do not want to share with others.
To conclude
, economic
development
 furnishes
people
 with improvement in many fields and positively affects living standards.
Although
 there are some downsides to
this
 phenomenon, they would rather be minor inconveniences in
people
’s lives.
Submitted by phamhoangminhthu24 on

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task response
Task Response: The essay addresses the prompt and presents a clear position. However, some areas could be further elaborated to strengthen the argument.
coherence cohesion
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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

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Linking words for giving examples:

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  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • standard of living
  • economic development
  • social values
  • materialism
  • community welfare
  • sustainable technologies
  • environmental degradation
  • social stratification
  • social cohesion
  • economic status
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