Teenage pregnancy is on the rise in many countries. Why is this? What measures (มาตรการ) are there to tackle (จัดการ) this problem?

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Nowadays, teenage
pregnancy
is indeed an issue
that is
increasing significantly in multiple countries. There are various factors that contribute to
this
phenomenon.
This
essay will discuss why
this
problem has become more prevalent and explore potential solutions to address it. Despite the fact that there are many aspects contributing to teenage
pregnancy
, one of the main reasons is a lack of
education
. When young people do not receive proper
education
about sexual health, birth control, and the potential consequences of early
pregnancy
, they are more likely to engage in risky sexual behaviour.
This
knowledge gap increases their vulnerability and decreases their ability to make informed decisions about their sexual well-being. To address and solve the problem, there are various actions that can be taken, with the government can play a pivotal role in
this
solution.
Firstly
, the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
can implement policies that make it mandatory for schools to provide comprehensive
education
on sexual health.
This
ensures that young people receive accurate information.
Additionally
,
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
allocating resources to train teachers in delivering effective sex
education
program
Fix the agreement mistake
programs
show examples
to guarantee that educators are equipped with the necessary knowledge and skills.
Furthermore
, collaboration between
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
, healthcare providers, and community organizations is
also
important. By working together, these groups can combine their efforts and resources to develop comprehensive strategies. In conclusion, teenage
pregnancy
is a complex issue influenced by multiple factors.
However
, a lack of
education
stands out as a significant contributor. To tackle it, the government should actively
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
its role. By addressing the root causes and promoting
education
and support, the rate of teenage
pregnancy
rate will be minimized, thereby encouraging young individuals to take responsibility for their sexual health.
Submitted by nnatthinee on

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Task Achievement
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Coherence & Cohesion
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Introduction
Your introduction effectively sets the stage for the discussion, offering clear insight into what will be addressed.
Task Achievement
The essay provides a comprehensive response to the prompt, covering both why teenage pregnancy is on the rise and potential measures to tackle it.
Logical Structure
You've maintained a logical structure throughout the essay, which makes it easy for readers to follow your arguments.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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