An increasing number of people are choosing cosmetic surgery/ plastic surgery. Why do people have operations to change the way they look? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#people #surgery #plastic #operations #change #development

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Cosmetic surgery has become rampant nowadays. Many people undergo minor or major surgeries to alter their physical appearances for some personal reasons,peer pressure or have been influenced mostly by social media. I believe that

this

Linking Words

trend has disadvantages for humankind and

this

Linking Words

essay will discuss the reasons for it. First and foremost,

due to

Linking Words

the technological advances that we have,we are more capable of changing almost everything we want to boost our self-esteem. The community take greater risks in undergoing operations just to look better and feel more of themselves if they can enhance their nose, body shape or contour.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, since there are a lot of cosmetic surgeons and clinics now,

public

Correct article usage

the public

show examples

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

a wide range of choices and easy access to them.

Moreover

Linking Words

, social media like TikTok, youtube

also

Linking Words

encourage their viewers to do

this

Linking Words

For instance

Linking Words

, if you can see an influencer endorsing a cosmetic surgeon or clinic saying

that is

Linking Words

how he or she managed to become beautiful on TV,

then

Linking Words

these followers may avail of those marketing strategies and follow the footsteps of their model. From my own perspective,

this

Linking Words

trend greatly affects one's self-esteem and developmental growth.

Instead

Linking Words

of accepting our own body and shape, many tend to compete with other folks and do more by changing who they are and becoming the person they are not.

Hence

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

will

also

Linking Words

lead to depression and self-identity crisis.

In addition

Linking Words

, paying for surgeries is

also

Linking Words

a waste of money.

For example

Linking Words

instead

Linking Words

of paying for rhinoplasty, they can use their budget for more valuable and meaningful things that will help in their study.

To sum up

Linking Words

, being contented and accepting one's self can never be denied to have a happy self and self-fulfilment.

Instead

Linking Words

of focusing on changing how we look to impress others, we must focus more on our own goals and own happiness.

Submitted by jtumacole10 on Sun Sep 17 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

310 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Everything has two coins, so we should approach things rationally.
7.5
band
In some countries owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might be this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation? Write atleast 250 words
Nowadays, together with over-population, the housing demand is a persistent problem which raises different opinions in communities. A group of people argue that building new homes in the countryside may harm its living conditions, while others agree that expanding housing in the countryside is a suitable solution. This essay will discuss both perspectives before giving my personal opinion.
6.5
band
In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?
There are some states where people are getting more and more overweight, which leads to various health issues. This essay will first suggest that the biggest problems caused by this phenomenon are bad eating habits and a sedentary lifestyle and then argue that a well-balanced diet and exercising are the most viable solutions.
<4
band
Present a written argument or case to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic: According to those in the travel business, the nature of the average 'holiday' is changing. Rather than seeking a relaxing break in a far-away place, people now want excitement on their holidays and are keen to participate in unusual and challenging activities. Do you agree or disagree?
The bar chart gives information about the students which enrolled in music faculty in Australian university over a period of 6 years, and the pie chart provides how they chose their career after the graduation.
7
band
It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sportsperson or musician. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
It is the view of some people that individuals who have talents in certain areas such as sports or music are born with it, while others believe that a child can learn to be good at these skills. Although people are indeed talented in these fields because they can achieve great feats with no training or with minimal effort, I believe that any child can learn to become good at certain skills if they work hard.

An increasing number of people are choosing cosmetic surgery/ plastic surgery. Why do people have operations to change the way they look? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

In some countries owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might be this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation? Write atleast 250 words

In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sportsperson or musician. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.