Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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It has been argued by some that successful sports professionals earn a lot of money, and it is unfair and a waste of money.

While

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others reject

this

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claim and think that their earnings are fully justified. In that essay will discuss both views and provide my own opinion with relevant examples.

To begin

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with, many individuals think that sportsmen’s work is not acquitted, and we should stop financing them to develop public

facilities

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As a result

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, in developing countries, it could contribute to many developmental progresses,

such

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as adequate education, public transport and medical care.

For instance

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, developing countries

such

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as Indonesia are investing all their funds in city development and providing more opportunities for society and businesses' well-being. In my opinion, public

facilities

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should be developed as much as possible, but

also

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provide opportunities for citizens to participate in sports tournaments.

On the other hand

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, another segment of society thinks that their job is justified and should be encouraged.

Moreover

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, the path to becoming a world-class athlete is competitive and requires hard work and discipline. In fact, facing very highly competitive tournaments for participants against athletes from all over the world not only bring income to the economy but

also

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honour and respect from other countries. I think we should not forget to improve public

facilities

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but

also

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, we ought to develop many sports directions.

To conclude

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, politics should improve public

facilities

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and care about our own residents as much as earn a reputation in every aspect where it is possible.

filwayySun Sep 17 2023

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task response

The introduction clearly presents both views and the writer's opinion. However, the body paragraphs need to provide more specific and relevant examples to support the points.

coherence and cohesion

The logical structure is mostly clear, but the essay lacks a strong conclusion. Additionally, the examples and supporting points need to be more closely related to the main topic. More explicit transitional devices can help improve overall coherence.

lexical resource

The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, but there are some lexical errors and inappropriate word choices. Use more precise and advanced vocabulary to express ideas.

grammatical range

While the sentences mostly show a range of complex structures, there are noticeable grammatical errors throughout the essay. Pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement, word forms, and sentence structures.

10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

253 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

financial remuneration
exceptional
merit
talent
demand
entertainment value
career span
physical demands
justified
unfair
criticism
income inequality
societal priorities
sportsmanship

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Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The crime rate nowadays is decreasing compared to the past due to advance technology which can prevent and solve crime. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, private companies spend more money on scientific research more than governments. Do you think its advantages outweigh disadvantages?

In some countries, people these days spend little time with their children. What are the causes of this? Whome does this affect more, parents or children?