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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows changes in average house prices in five different cities between 1990 and 2002 compared with the average house prices in 1989.

The chart below shows changes in average house prices in five different cities between 1990 and 2002 compared with the average house prices in 1989.
#changes #house #prices #five #cities
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The chart compares the average house
prices
Use synonyms
 of various countries in 1989 with the periods of 1990 to 1995 and 1996 to 2002.
Overall
Linking Words
 , the average
prices
Use synonyms
 for the
period
Use synonyms
 of 1990 to 1995 decreased for New
york
Capitalize word
York
show examples
,
Tokyo
Use synonyms
 and London compared to 1989
while
Linking Words
 Madrid and Frankfurt increased. For the
period
Use synonyms
 of 1996 to 2002, most of the cities' house
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
 rose except for
Tokyo
Use synonyms
. London and
Tokyo
Use synonyms
 's real estate
prices
Use synonyms
 dropped
for
Change preposition
by
show examples
 around 7% in
1990
Correct article usage
the 1990
show examples
 to 1995
period
Use synonyms
 compared to 1989. It is
also
Linking Words
 the highest decline amongst all other countries and periods. Frankfurt on the other
hands
Fix the agreement mistake
hand
show examples
 recorded the most increase in housing
prices
Use synonyms
 in that
period
Use synonyms
 with more than
3
Correct article usage
a 3
show examples
%
rose
Replace the word
rise
show examples
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
show examples
 to 1989. For the
period
Use synonyms
 of 1996 - 2002 . London
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
turns
Change the verb form
turned
show examples
 sharply from
7
Correct article usage
a 7
show examples
% decrease to more than
12
Correct article usage
a 12
show examples
% increase which is
also
Linking Words
 the highest amongst all other cities and periods. All other countries have recorded an increase in housing
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
 in the
period
Use synonyms
 of 1996 to 2002 except for
Tokyo
Use synonyms
 which
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
recorded a 5% decline in housing
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
 to 1989.
Submitted by sherwoodchan1218 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words prices, period, tokyo with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "compares" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 4 times.
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