It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

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Nowadays,

people

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believe in taking risks in all parts of their

lives

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, both job-related and private aspects. In my view, the benefits of having

this

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brave attitude towards life surpass its negative points for several reasons which will be discussed in the following paragraphs. The greatest point of risk-taking behaviour is that

people

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will reach high-level opportunities which will not happen in normal situations, so they can get out of their awful situation and promote themselves.

For example

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, whenever a clerk who has job dissatisfaction quits his/her job and looks for a new well-paid job, he/she is taking a risk to improve the financial situation.

In addition

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this

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group of society with

such

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an attitude towards life can gain a variety of experiences from all their wins and failures.

It is clear that

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they are the kinds of

people

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with high self-esteem and braveness who fight to make their

lives

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better. The major drawback of taking risks and accepting all its challenges is that

people

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may lose all their investments and their

lives

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in a moment.

Also

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For instance

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, when an individual takes a risk and sells all his/her possessions to invest in the stock market, because of the fluctuations of the market he/she fails and can not compensate for it.

Nonetheless

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, taking

people

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not only cannot help their situation but can

also

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worsen it. In summary, I can understand why some

people

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may have a fear of accepting challenges in their

lives

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, but it seems to me that taking risks can lead to a better life and financial conditions.

z.rajabiWed Nov 08 2023

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Task Achievement

To achieve a higher score in task achievement, ensure that your essay fully addresses all parts of the task. While the essay has responded to the question, the argument could be more balanced by discussing the disadvantages of risk-taking in equal measure to the advantages, providing a more nuanced view.

Coherence and Cohesion

To improve in coherence and cohesion, aim for a clearer progression of ideas. Use a wider range of linking devices and paragraphing to help present your points more logically, making it easier for the reader to follow your argument. This includes varying your connectors and transition phrases rather than relying on simpler, more repetitive ones.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

260 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Opportunities
Growth
Innovation
Challenges
Self-discovery
Resilience
Uncertainty
Consequences
Calculated risks
Stagnation
Regret
Comfort zone
Entrepreneurship
Adventurous spirit
Thriving
Failure
Mitigate
Reap the rewards

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To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?

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