some people believe that culture will be ruined if it used to earn tourism revenue, but others consider that tourism is the only way of protecting culture. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

#people #culture #tourism #revenue

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It is believed that

culture

Use synonyms

will be destroyed if it

used

Add a missing verb

is used

show examples

to earn

tourism

Use synonyms

income, but others

thought

Wrong verb form

think

show examples

that

tourism

Use synonyms

is the only way of preserving

culture

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

essay agrees with the second statement and will explain in the following essay. On the one hand,

tourism

Use synonyms

is the most effective way to protect. Travellers travel to an area to learn about

these

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

local

culture

Use synonyms

they

Correct your spelling

the

show examples

learn about customs of the area or some traditional

festival

Fix the agreement mistake

festivals

show examples

, or they can try local traditional

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

For example

Linking Words

, if you go to Bat Trang’s pottery, you can learn about

this

Linking Words

village

Change noun form

village's

show examples

history, you can

also

Linking Words

try making items which are made from pottery.

Moreover

Linking Words

, the evolution of technology

such

Linking Words

as smartphone, computer etc. make young people less likely to pay attention

about

Change preposition

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

culture

Use synonyms

travelling

Correct your spelling

Travelling

show examples

the

Correct article usage

show examples

way to introduce

culture

Use synonyms

to young people and make them know it.

On the other hand

Linking Words

tourism

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

the main reason that

destroy

Change the verb form

destroys

show examples

the

culture

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, Ao Dai of Vietnam

attached

Add a missing verb

is attached

show examples

with

Change preposition

show examples

Vietnam women, but a lot of foreign tourists know

this

Linking Words

culture

Use synonyms

and they use it to make dirty content on social media like

facebook

Capitalize word

Facebook

show examples

youtube

Correct your spelling

YouTube

show examples

tiktok

Correct your spelling

TikTok

etc. It

make

Change the verb form

makes

show examples

our

culture

Use synonyms

worse in

other foreign tourist mind

Change the wording

another foreign tourist mind

other foreign tourist minds

show examples

. What is more, tourists who

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

lack of aware can destroy some historical sites. In conclusion,

tourism

Use synonyms

can ruin the

culture

Use synonyms

. It is

also

Linking Words

a factor to preserve our tradition.

Submitted by [email protected] on Mon Sep 25 2023

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

234 words

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some people believe that culture will be ruined if it used to earn tourism revenue, but others consider that tourism is the only way of protecting culture. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Your opinion

Many believe that modern technology has brought people together, but others say that it has driven us apart. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion.

It is important to be concerned about international events, even if those events have no direct impact on our lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think is a positive or negative development?