Many people today would argue that cinemas are becoming irrelevant due to new streaming services. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #cinemas #services

Some people believe that

cinemas

are becoming less attractive than new streaming ecosystems

such

as Netflix and

Youtube

Correct your spelling

YouTube

show examples

. In my

opinion

Add a comma

,opinion

show examples

this

approach is

complety

Correct your spelling

completely

acceptable

due to

these

platforms

' abilities. The main difference between conventional

cinemas

and streaming services is their

flexibilities

Fix the agreement mistake

flexibility

show examples

. Cinema saloons only offer 8-10

movies

as options,

on the other hand

, consumers have much more alternatives on Netflix or Amazon.

For instance

, if a person only

Change the verb form

likes

show examples

to watch romantic

movies

, those saloons may not have a

movie

Change preposition

show examples

this

genre.

This

limitation might force customers to watch undesired

movies

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and

affects

Correct subject-verb agreement

affect

show examples

their moods.

Therefore

, lots of customers show

interests

Fix the agreement mistake

interest

show examples

to use

Change preposition

in using

show examples

online

movie

platforms

based on previous experiences. Another factor which affects

balance

Add an article

the balance

show examples

between

cinemas

and online services

that

Add a missing verb

is that

show examples

cinemas

require

enourmous

Correct your spelling

enormous

effort to prepare for consuming content. Nowadays going to

cinema

Add an article

the cinema

show examples

is a full-time activity which has its own rituals

such

as going to

mall

Add an article

the mall

show examples

and window shopping before entering the

movie

saloon or eating fast food just before or after the event. Some people do not have much time to do all of these things,

thus

those only want to watch the content.

Moreover

, individuals can easily start to watch a

movie

through streaming

platforms

furthermore

Add a comma

,furthermore

show examples

they do not have to suffer from these obligations. In conclusion, some part of

Correct article usage

the

show examples

community

believe

Correct subject-verb agreement

believes

show examples

that watching

movies

cinemas

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

becoming unpopular, and

this

may be related

with

Change preposition

show examples

new streaming

platforms

. From my point of view,

flexibility

Add an article

the flexibility

show examples

these platform

Change the determiner

this platform

these platforms

show examples

are superior

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and

required

Correct article usage

the required

show examples

effort for watching

Remove the article

apply

show examples

content is optimal for lots of people who want to use their limited time wisely.

Submitted by historicalpen on Mon Sep 25 2023

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

268 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many people today would argue that cinemas are becoming irrelevant due to new streaming services. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some countries have introduced laws to limit working hours for employees. Why are these laws introduced? Do you think they are a positive or negative development?

Without capital punishment our lives are less secure and crimes or violence increase. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

The best way to teach children to cooperate is through team sports at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some countries police officers do not carry guns. How does this affect the manner they implement law and order? Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of having a gun. Provide specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.