Some people believe that culture will be ruined if it is used to earn tourism revenue, but others consider that tourism is the only way of protecting a culture. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #culture #tourism #revenue

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The current issue of preserving national identity is an issue that all countries are trying to solve .

Although

Linking Words

there are many opinions that

culture

Use synonyms

will be destroyed

due to

Linking Words

commercial activities, I personally agree with the other view that tourism has great contributions to preserving

culture

Use synonyms

and popularizing it and making it out all over the world On one hand, many individuals believe that using

culture

Use synonyms

with the goal of making a profit will cause it to degrade. The most common reason is that ancient treasures are easily collected by tourists. It is possible to find treasures from dynasties in Vietnam today that are quite weak and easily attracted by children or unconscious adults.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, there are modern forms of business that attract young people. than ancient architectural works. The most obvious example is that young people prefer tall buildings to visiting historical sites.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, there are still many opinions that the commercialization of

culture

Use synonyms

will help it become more popular and gain more attention.

First,

Linking Words

historical tourist sites will be widely promoted to everyone and will

then

Linking Words

bring in revenue to maintain their original condition. Even though the Independence Palace was built a long time ago, it still retains its original beauty thanks to the revenue from selling entrance tickets to tourists.

Next,

Linking Words

selling and wearing traditional costumes is an action that greatly affects the

culture

Use synonyms

of a person. Korea, Japan, China, and Vietnam all have traditional costumes that are known to the world thanks to their commercialization and have succeeded in preserving them. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

there are many conflicting opinions about using

culture

Use synonyms

for

business

Add an article

the business

show examples

. I completely agree with developing a

culture

Use synonyms

that supports business.

Tue Sep 26 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that the introduction clearly presents the main points and that the conclusion effectively summarizes the essay. Additionally, use topic sentences to guide the reader through the main points of the essay.

task achievement

Address both sides of the argument more thoroughly and provide specific examples to support each point. Ensure that the essay fully responds to the prompt by exploring the complexities of the issue.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

281 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
With the development of technology, children are now living in a world that is different to what it was 50 years ago. What problems does this situation cause for society and family ?
Technology has greatly evolved in past 50 years changing the world today compared to how it was years ago. Today children are living and growing up in the era of artificial intelligence which brings many advantages and disadvantages to society and family. In current times, technology will create multiple problems such as constant increase in security risks and reduction in childrens' physical activities.
4.5
band
Films and games can be accessed at any time from mobile devices like smart phones, tablets and laptop computer. Do the advantages of such development outweigh the disadvantage? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Two decades ago, If we want to watch movie, Cinema theatre was the only available option and it depeds on the place where we live. It was accessible for the City population but it was occationally posible for urban and rual population. A decade ago, Televison got popular where lot of channels started playing moving and Video games become popular. It was very fancy electronic gadget then to have video game at home.
7.5
band
Some people think that children who spend a lot of time reading children’s story book are wasting their time which could be better used doing other more useful activities. To what extend do you agree?
The role of children's storybooks in a child's development is a subject of ongoing debate. While some argue that reading these books is a waste of time and that children could engage in more useful activities, I strongly disagree with this view. Reading storybooks provides numerous benefits that are crucial for a child's intellectual and emotional growth.
4
band
Some colleges encourage students to create businesses while they are still in school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?
Encouraging college students to embark on entrepreneurial ventures yields a spectrum of benefits and challenges. On the positive side, it fosters practical learning, allowing students to apply classroom theories in real-world scenarios. The hands-on experience nurtures skills like problem-solving, leadership, and time management, enriching their education beyond textbooks. Moreover, it opens doors to invaluable networks, connecting them with mentors and resources crucial for entrepreneurial success. Financially, a successful venture can offer stability, reducing the burden of student loans.
4
band
Some people believe that robots are important humanity’s future while others think that they are dangerous and that they will impact the society negatively. Discuss this both view and give your own opinion.
In this day and age, the topic of Artificial Intelligence is something which bears some consideration. Whether robots play a significant role in people's future or they brings the negative affect for society. This essay agrees that it is more benefical for human because of the presence of robots than the drawbacks.

Some people believe that culture will be ruined if it is used to earn tourism revenue, but others consider that tourism is the only way of protecting a culture. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

With the development of technology, children are now living in a world that is different to what it was 50 years ago. What problems does this situation cause for society and family ?

Films and games can be accessed at any time from mobile devices like smart phones, tablets and laptop computer. Do the advantages of such development outweigh the disadvantage? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people think that children who spend a lot of time reading children’s story book are wasting their time which could be better used doing other more useful activities. To what extend do you agree?

Some colleges encourage students to create businesses while they are still in school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that robots are important humanity’s future while others think that they are dangerous and that they will impact the society negatively. Discuss this both view and give your own opinion.