IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

It is sometimes said that people should be encouraged to get married before they are 30, as this is best for the individual and the society. Do you agree or designee?

#people #society #designee
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Marriage
Use synonyms
 is a big step for everyone. People in many societies encourage the youngest to get married before the age of 30. They believe that a woman must start her own family and have children before she turns 40. For others,
marriage
Use synonyms
 should come only if you feel ready, with no age limitations. In my mind,
this
Linking Words
issue
Use synonyms
 depends on everyone's beliefs, and people don't must VERB PROBLEM apply There may be a verb use
issue
Use synonyms
 here. show examples have a plan or even a to-do list for things they have to do until a specific age.
Firstly
Linking Words
, I will start with the fact that nowadays, the youngest continue their after-school education for many years. They want to have a good educational and career path.
Although
Linking Words
 they do many studies for various years, they start their careers after their early thirties. They may have several relationships, but they only focus on making a good life. So the matter of
marriage
Use synonyms
 isn't an
issue
Use synonyms
, that they want to face early in their lives.
Secondly
Linking Words
, there is a social thought, which is coming from the elderly ones, that everybody needs to have a companion and make a family, for having kids and grandkids as they are young. In spite of that need, I strongly believe that everybody can have companions and kids without getting married. We are living in a new generation world, with no stereotypes and tabus. We don't have to look back at what our grandparents did in their years. Our societies need to have educated citizens, who can work and be productive. Nobody cares about your family status.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 is an
issue
Use synonyms
 because people become estranged, and selfis. Raising their children with these manners. For the status of
marriage
Use synonyms
 or not
marriage
Use synonyms
, I believe that everyone knows which and when is the right time. But for passing to new generations ethics and values I strongly believe we are obliged. Closing, encouraged to get married before 30, has nothing to do with individual and society.
Submitted by mayiou on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: