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Band 6.5

Some people believe that purpose of education is to prepare people to be useful members for society .other say that the purpose of education is to achieve personal ambitions. discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #purpose #education #members #society #ambitions
Literacy Plays a vital role in the upbringing of society. Many people say that the aim of academic study is to provide a contribution to the community
whereas
, others believe it can be used to achieve their individual desires. The contradictory views of the above notion will be discussed
along with
 my opinion in the upcoming paragraphs.
To embark
Fix the infinitive
Embark
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on
Change preposition
apply
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, an individual can gain social values
initially
 from their schools and can implement that in the public. Educated people can easily interact with any people and diversity in terms of sexism and racism could be reduced to an extent.
For example
, a manager in a reputed company who works as a volunteer in a charity shop is truly an inspiration for all budding youngsters.
In addition
, they can contribute to change in society development by implementing projects that benefit their particular region.
However
, literacy helps a person to meet their personal goals. They will be able to achieve higher positions if they are well educated
thus
,their individual preferences can be attained in a short span of time. To illustrate, a person who loves elderly care can choose geriatric courses to fulfil their dreams.
Along with
 that, education makes a man confident to go through his ways.
Hence
, they would be more productive in their particular fields. In my opinion, education is necessary for an individual to carry out future plans
however
, the person should be liable to show a commitment to the community. To recapitulate, a literate can bring changes to society by tackling the issues the public faces.
Also
, education can be used to achieve their own individual desires.
Submitted by ansamerrin987 on

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task response
Ensure a clear and thorough response to all aspects of the task question. Provide a balanced discussion that addresses both views equally.
coherence and cohesion
Maintain clear and logical progression of ideas throughout the essay. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus and contributes to the overall argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • collective progression
  • civic sense
  • self-improvement
  • fulfillment
  • democratic processes
  • career goals
  • ethics
  • personal development
  • societal contribution
  • educational systems
  • interdependence
  • economy
  • culture
  • individual success
  • well-being
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