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Band 8

The best way for a government to prepare for the future is to invest in young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#government #future #people
Some people argue that the government's contribution to the young generation is the best preparation for the future. I totally agree, and my view will be explained in
this
 essay. First and foremost, government investment in young individuals can significantly contribute to social progress and address pressing national issues. Adolescents contribute a huge part of each country's workforce, especially in the industry, construction, and trade sectors.
Therefore
, it can be said that, whether countries are successful or not, the answer comes from the adolescent. Maybe investing is a long process, including education, and infrastructure, but it will definitely have good results.
For example
, Vietnam has a young population with ages ranging from 15 to 64 years old 69.3% of their population.
This
 developing nation always attracts large foreign partners to their country,
such
 as SAMSUNG or FOX CORN, helping to significantly increase GDP income per person to 5000 USD in 2022.
In addition
 to developing the economy, adolescents are
also
 a resource to protect their territory, ready to enlist when there is a general mobilization order.
Furthermore
, exclusive investment in young individuals
also
 reduces the burden directed towards the elderly. It can be said that the tradition of respecting teachers, filial piety, or love of homeland has been taught from generation to generation. Supporting the young, and those young,
as a result
, will help the older.
For instance
, tax money collected from youth will be used to pay living expenses for the elderly,
such
 as pension payments and hospital bills.
Additionally
, young people's call for contributions to raise money for the elderly who are alone or in difficult circumstances
also
 contributes significantly to reducing the burden on the elderly. In conclusion, it is apparent that government bodies will benefit greatly from investing in their young individuals because they will lead their country in the right direction in the future if they are educated effectively.
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task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Add clearer topic sentences to indicate the main points of each paragraph.
grammatical range accuracy
Work on improving sentence structures and grammar.
lexical resource
Use more varied vocabulary and expressions.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • innovation
  • adaptability
  • entrepreneurship
  • demographics
  • socioeconomic
  • civic engagement
  • leadership
  • sustainable development
  • preventative measures
  • infrastructure
  • global competitiveness
  • skill development
  • vocational training
  • public policy
  • social welfare
  • human capital
  • technological literacy
  • inclusive growth
  • long-term planning
  • fiscal responsibility
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