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Band 7

Some people spend a lot of money celebrating personal family events, such as weddings and birthdays. How important is it to celebrate such events? Do you think people spend too much money on these events?

#people #money #events #weddings #birthdays
Certain people spend excess money on celebrating functions like marriages and birthday parties.
This
 essay highlights the importance of celebration
as well as
 an alternative way to spend the day.
Firstly
, in order to relive the memories folks love to celebrate the important events of their lives by booking hotels and, banquet halls. Even a few famous families visit exotic places like The Maldives , Paris ,and New York to create nostalgia. To illustrate , Deepika Padukone and Ranvir Singh ,a popular Bollywood couple celebrated their anniversary with their families and friends in The Taj, in Mumbai and informed the press that it was a nostalgic event for them as memories were recreated again.
Moreover
, in today's busy schedule ,interaction with loved ones has been reduced to almost negligible.
such
 parties are a means of getting caught up with a known relative or a friend and an appropriate time to gossip about lives ,tours ,businesses etcetera.
For example
 , a birthday party of Nita Ambani became the talk of the town as it was attended by
all
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
world-class personalities like Rihanna and she was found grooving to a Bollywood song and enjoying herself with the likes of Anushka Sharma and many more. In my opinion, special days can be celebrated by donating to the needy rather than arranging luxurious parties . To cite an example , Mr. Ratan Tata,an influential industrialist ,every year on his birthday feeds five lakhs of poor people for two consecutive days
thus
, giving them the basic necessities,the food.
To conclude
 ,everyone is free to choose the way he or she wants to spend ,yet a sensible action of spending money like doing a charity is always appreciated because many needy
persons
Replace the word
people
show examples
 benefit
Submitted by lkapila25 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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