You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this . You should write at least 250 words.

#minutes #countries #people #work #travel #year #school #university #studies

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Young individuals in several nations are recommended to work or travel for a

year

Use synonyms

between finishing high school and commencing

university

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. In my view, the advantage is young

people

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can gain knowledge and experience,

while

Linking Words

the disadvantage is they find it difficult to come back to an academic environment. On the one hand,

this

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advice is beneficial for young

people

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because the

university

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environment calls for experience and open-mindedness.

As a result

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, these young

people

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are more independent compared with their peers who go directly from school to

university

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and have a broadened view of life and better personal experiences.

For example

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, if they work somewhere, they can probably learn faster important lessons or skills.

Therefore

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, they are able to expand their horizons,

as well as

Linking Words

develop their social skills.

On the other hand

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, there are some dangers in taking off at that important age. Young

people

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may end up never turning to their studies or finding it difficult to readapt to an academic environment because they may think that it is better to pursue a career or try something completely different from a

university

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course.

For instance

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, students who decide to take a gap

year

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recently choose another road rather than going to

university

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However

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, I think

this

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is less likely to happen these days and the benefits of doing that are far more than the drawbacks. In conclusion, it is clearly seen that one

year

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is very important, especially, in today's world. A gap

year

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has some benefits but

also

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has some drawbacks.

Submitted by baonhi260804 on Thu Feb 29 2024

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task achievement

To improve your essay, consider adding a clear and direct thesis statement in your introduction. This statement should outline the main points that will be discussed, providing a roadmap for the reader.

coherence cohesion

Develop your paragraphs with clear topic sentences that introduce the main idea of each paragraph. This will help in achieving a better structure and making your argument more coherent.

task achievement

Incorporate specific examples to support your points. These examples can be hypothetical scenarios, personal experiences, or factual data. More detailed examples will make your arguments stronger and more convincing.

coherence cohesion

Consider adding a concluding sentence to each body paragraph that summarizes the main idea of the paragraph and links it to the essay's overall argument. This technique can enhance the coherence of your essay.

task achievement

Revisit the task's requirements to ensure that you are fully addressing both the advantages and disadvantages of the topic. Be sure to discuss each aspect in sufficient detail and with balanced analysis.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

255 words

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