Some people believe that university students should pay all the cost of studies because univerity education only benefit the students themselves not the society as a whole. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some people
thought
Wrong verb form
think
show examples
that students in higher education should pay all the cost of studies because it only develops personal skills and does not have any input to
society
. I
totaly
Correct your spelling
totally
disagree with the view because if
society
want
Change the verb form
wants
show examples
to develop
themselves
Correct pronoun usage
itself
show examples
,
they
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
show examples
highly educated people in
science
Correct article usage
the science
show examples
and technology field. On the one hand, nowadays every country facing
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
serious challenges
such
as
,
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apply
show examples
pandemics,
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the effect
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effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
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of
climate
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the climate
show examples
crisis, and agricultural
product's
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product
show examples
shortage
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shortages
show examples
. Only
collabrative
Correct your spelling
collaborative
works
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work
show examples
between scientists could solve those problems because they are to much complex.
For example
, with the
last
pandemic all the world
try
Wrong verb form
tried
show examples
to find a way to battle
with Corona virus
Correct your spelling
the coronavirus,
but only
german
Capitalize word
German
show examples
scientists
succeed
Wrong verb form
succeeded
show examples
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
producing
vaccine
Correct article usage
a vaccine
show examples
and
make
Wrong verb form
making
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it feasible to produce. Because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
it is not only about biology
also
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
consists
different
Change preposition
of different
show examples
sub-problems from production in high titer to stable transformation without degradation.
On the other hand
,
country's
Correct article usage
the country's
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economies
driven
Add a missing verb
are driven
show examples
by high-tech companies that
focuses
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focus
show examples
on software, robotics and synthetic biology. They have high
reveneu
Correct your spelling
revenue
potential and
this
bring
Change the verb form
brings
show examples
them with paying high taxes to
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
. In
this
way, the
goverments
Correct your spelling
government
governments
could make more investment
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
important areas that
benefits
Change the verb form
benefit
show examples
all
society
Change preposition
of society
show examples
such
as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
health and education.
For example
, San Francisco has little land area when
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
show examples
with other locations but it's
generate
Correct subject-verb agreement
generates
show examples
more
reveneu
Correct your spelling
revenue
than other countries because of the slicon
valley
Capitalize word
Valley
show examples
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
biggest software companies located
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
. In conclusion,
society
needs educated people that have important skills in science and engineering
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
.
This
is
only
Add an article
the only
show examples
way
to
Change preposition
for to
show examples
countries move forward and bring
society
to
better
Correct article usage
a better
show examples
place.
Submitted by airbender on

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task achievement
Provide a clearer thesis statement in the introduction to clearly state your position.
coherence cohesion
Improve the organization of your ideas by using paragraphs to separate your main points.
task achievement
Expand on your arguments and provide more supporting details.
lexical resource
Use more varied sentence structures and vocabulary.
grammatical range accuracy
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to improve accuracy.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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