Some parents forbid young children from owning smart phones (cell phones with Internet access), while others disagree and believe that they are important tools for keeping in touch. Which point of view do you think is better, and why?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, the world is changing every second into something better and more advanced. In these uncertain times, many
parents
Use synonyms
are comfortable giving their
children
Use synonyms
, the freedom of using
smartphones
Use synonyms
whereas
Linking Words
some argue it can be a bad influence.
According to
Linking Words
me,
smartphones
Use synonyms
are a boon to mankind in
this
Linking Words
era. First and foremost, if not handled with care, these devices can be a nuisance to the
parents
Use synonyms
and society. As
children
Use synonyms
can have access to anything on the internet, they might get exposed to illegal websites and adult content which is harmful to the entire society.
Additionally
Linking Words
, there are increase in fraudulent activities and
children
Use synonyms
can become victims of them. To exemplify, there are incidents where hackers try to lure
children
Use synonyms
in via emails and messages.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
smartphones
Use synonyms
are so advanced these days, that any information about the world can be found with just one click of a finger.
Children
Use synonyms
can get great help with their studies and research. There is nothing in the world that the internet does not help us with.
Also
Linking Words
, it saves the cost of hiring a tutor for
children
Use synonyms
which makes it budget-friendly.
For instance
Linking Words
, a child can learn a new language completely online without spending loads of money on language tutors just by enrolling or downloading a language application. To support
this
Linking Words
further
Linking Words
, using
smartphones
Use synonyms
for several tasks can be time-saving and efficient.
Children
Use synonyms
can book an Uber or order food from restaurants in the absence of
parents
Use synonyms
, which was an impossible task a few years ago.
Parents
Use synonyms
do not have to worry about them if they have
smartphones
Use synonyms
because
children
Use synonyms
can be independent and safe at the same time.
For example
Linking Words
, there are applications that can track your child’s phone and provide real-time location updates every second. To sum it up, there are
parents
Use synonyms
who do not like young folks owning
smartphones
Use synonyms
because of increasing crime among the young generation,
while
Linking Words
some trust that for the betterment and safety of their
children
Use synonyms
, phones are crucial. In my opinion,
Smartphones
Use synonyms
have a lot to offer to
this
Linking Words
generation if used appropriately and wisely.
Also
Linking Words
, to stop growing crime, not only we should keep track of the use of
smartphones
Use synonyms
among
children
Use synonyms
, but we should
also
Linking Words
permit only legal websites on search engines.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure that the introduction clearly states the writer's opinion on the topic and includes a thesis statement that previews the main points to be discussed.
coherence cohesion
Organize the ideas more logically by considering the use of topic sentences and cohesive devices within paragraphs.
task achievement
Provide more specific and relevant examples to support the main points.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary and phrasing to enhance the lexical resource.
grammatical range accuracy
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to improve accuracy.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • forbid
  • smartphones
  • cell phones
  • Internet access
  • importance
  • keeping in touch
  • negative impacts
  • development
  • social skills
  • engaging
  • physical activities
  • glued to a screen
  • staying connected
  • communication
  • convenience
  • limited access
  • encouraging
  • face-to-face interactions
  • family
  • friends
What to do next:
Look at other essays: