Some people believe that money is the most important factor for achiveing happiness. However, others believe that happiness has nothing to do with money. Discuss both views abd give your opinion.
One of the social concerns today relates to the importance of finance in life.
While
it is widely believed that money is an important factor for achieving happiness; others believe that wealth is nothing towards joys in life. I am going to discuss both views. In my opinion, although
fund
is not everything, people will find their lives challenging without good finances.
On the one hand, it is argued that people who have rich properties will feel happier day by day. The main reason is that they have enough cash to equip basic needs Add an article
the fund
such
as food, shelter and healthcare. As a result
, it is possible to say that individuals who have amazing incomes always have satisfied emotions because they are protected against sickness and hunger. One good illustration of this
is rich community can eat good food, wear beautiful costumes and visit doctors regularly for health check-ups.
On the other hand
, it is strongly believed that cash can not buy delight. People often have this
opinion because relations, experiences and personal growth are not goods, so they can not exchange. A second point is that money is not the appropriate element to achieve long-term happiness and well-being because social connections and personal fulfilment are the priorities to building pleasant. For example
, personal values will be necessary elements to establish the individual's worth.
In conclusion, it is commonly thought that the wealthy are the most powerful in life; meanwhile, others assume that money is certainly important but happiness has nothing to do with it. Personally, I tend to believe that properties are only important for achieving financial security, it is not the most important factor in overall
well-being and peace of mind.Submitted by yeshomeclass on
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coherence cohesion
The essay demonstrates logical structure but could benefit from clearer paragraphing and transitions to guide the reader more effectively through the argument.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that the introduction and conclusion are well-defined, presenting clear topic introduction and summarizing main points without introducing new ideas.
coherence cohesion
Support each main point with detailed and fully developed arguments, as well as more varied examples. Some main points lack full elaboration and depth.
task achievement
Make sure to completely answer all parts of the task and provide a balanced discussion of both viewpoints before giving your own opinion.
task achievement
Develop your ideas clearly and comprehensively, ensuring they are directly relevant to the question and fully answer the prompt.
task achievement
Include more relevant examples that are specific and accurately support the main points. Avoid generic statements and strive for more concrete illustrations.