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Band 4.5

In many countries around the world , rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#countries #world #people #cities #population #countryside #development
People
 always try
do
Correct your spelling
to
show examples
 relocate
in
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to
show examples
 the best place where they can have better standards of living.
This
 development might be negative for both cities and
countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
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.
In
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This
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this
 essay will be discussed
disadvantages
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the disadvantages
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 of the trend
such
 as
congestion
Correct article usage
the congestion
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 of urban infrastructure and
Correct article usage
the redusinig
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redusinig
Correct your spelling
reducing
 agricultural
sector
 of
economy
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the economy
show examples
. Undoubtedly
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
cities provide more
oportunities
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opportunities
 for their dwellers
for
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to
show examples
istance
Correct your spelling
improve
 quality education, healthcare system,
entertainment
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and entertainment
show examples
.
As a
result
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result,
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 majority
young
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of young
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people
 move to
teh
Correct your spelling
the
 city.
the
Capitalize word
The
show examples
 influx of rural residents creates
a
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apply
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significant congestion on public transport facilities. Public transport becomes overcrowded not only during rush hours but
all
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at all
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time
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times
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. In order to
decide
Verb problem
solve
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this
 problem the government has to increase the
number
 of buses,
trams
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and trams
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.
This
 will
requirw
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require
finincial
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financial
 investments.
Also
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Also,
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 the
number
 of cars on the roads considerably
grow
Correct subject-verb agreement
grows
show examples
. It leads to traffic jams. Energy systems are
also
 designed for a certain
number
 of
people
. If the population of cities grow, energy systems have to be
strengten
Correct your spelling
strengthen
. What is more ,
decreasing
Wrong verb form
a decrease
show examples
number
Correct article usage
the number
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 of
people
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rural areas can lead to
reducting
Correct article usage
a reducting
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financial
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in financial
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 support from the government and
as a result
 to disappearance of rural areas. Usually countryside provides
agricultural
Correct article usage
the agricultural
show examples
sector
 of
country
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the country
show examples
. It's
very
Rephrase
apply
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essential for each country
has
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to have
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developed
Correct article usage
a developed
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 agricultural
sector
whis
Correct your spelling
that
 produces many types of
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 for
population
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the population
show examples
. Shortage of workforce might be a cause of serious problems in
agricultural
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the agricultural
show examples
sector
 too. In
conclusion
Add a comma
conclusion,
show examples
 the decrease
of
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in
show examples
 rural population is a serious problem for any country
firstly
 because it
van be
Wrong verb form
can
show examples
 cause
of
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apply
show examples
dramatical negative changes in
agricultural
Add an article
the agricultural
show examples
sector
,
also
 it
mught
Correct your spelling
might
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
require substantial financial investments in support of
robust
Correct article usage
the robust
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
city.
Submitted by madam.prilukova12 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • rural-to-urban migration
  • population shift
  • positive impact
  • negative impact
  • urbanization
  • job opportunities
  • access to education
  • access to healthcare
  • urban infrastructure
  • rural traditions
  • cultural heritage
What to do next:
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