Some people say it is OK to use animals for our benefit, others say it is not good to exploit them. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

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Animals

Use synonyms

are part of our ecosystem that cannot be disregarded.

While

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some

people

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think that using

animals

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adequately for living purpose

are

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fine, others think that we should not use

animals

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for individual benefit. I believe that using

animals

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for our society is acceptable but not to the extent of exploiting them.

To begin

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with, there are things that only

animals

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can provide.

For instance

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, animal-based protein for human health

such

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as cows and lambs. it is a necessity to have a balanced diet to achieve a healthy life.

Additionally

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, using some

animals

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to help the disabled

has

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have

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become popular,

such

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as a guide dog for

Correct article usage

apply

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blind

people

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or to detect high blood pressure for

Correct article usage

apply

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sick

people

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. those dogs are trained and they were considered as

Correct article usage

apply

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working

dog

Fix the agreement mistake

dogs

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on the other hand

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, if exploitation and animal cruelty are involved, it would be a different story.

in particular

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, illegal animal hunting and illegal sea fishing are examples of behaviours that harm the environment. because of those acts, a lot of fauna ceased to

almost

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be almost

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extinct.

furthermore

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, elephants hunting for their tusk or ivory and whales hunting for profits are despicable. the hunter only thinks about their personal benefit without thinking about the long-term effect of their wrong-doings. in conclusion, I believe that utilising

animals

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for necessity without exploitation is all right.

however

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, we should

also

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consider the animal's cruelty and control their population to have a balanced ecosystem. For these reasons,

people

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have to be more aware of these issues and the government should make proper regulations about them.

hanna.rahmawati93Sat Oct 14 2023

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task achievement

Make sure to include a clear thesis statement in your introduction that outlines your stance on the topic.

lexical resource

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grammatical range accuracy

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coherence cohesion

Check the coherence of your essay by ensuring that your ideas flow logically and are supported with clear examples.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

261 words

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Some people say it is OK to use animals for our benefit, others say it is not good to exploit them. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

Nowadays, more and more older people who need employment have to compete with younger people for the same jobs. What problems does this cause? What are the solutions?

Scientists and technology experts are more valuable to society than artists.To what extent do you agree with this view?

Some believe that the government should support artists like musicians, painters, and poets, while others argue that this is a misuse of funds. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

In some countries, a lot of children have health issues and are becoming overweight. Some people think that the government should be responsible for solving this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is not necessary for people to travel to other places to learn about the culture. We can learn as much as from books, films and the internet. To what extent do you agree or disagree?