The pie chart below shows the frequency of U.S. Adults’ online purchasing habits in 2015, while the bar chart shows a further classification denoting online purchasing preferences.
The
given
pie chart depicts the percentages of American adults’ Verb problem
apply
habits spent
their money to buy goods in e-commerce Wrong verb form
spending
dividing
Wrong verb form
divided
in
four criteria in 2015 Change the preposition
into
while
the bar chart illustrates the preferences (in online or offline store
) of them
purchasing necessities which is separated Correct pronoun usage
apply
in
four different categories. Change preposition
into
Overall
, men and women mostly tended to buy things less often while
there were few shoppers in Correct article usage
the U.S
U.S
Correct your spelling
U.S.
liked
buying stuff weekly. Correct pronoun usage
who liked
However
, nowadays Americans like to purchase in offline store
by online transfer Fix the agreement mistake
stores
while
fewer people are cashless buying stuff in physical store
, except weekly online customers.
Fix the agreement mistake
stores
To begin
with, 37% people
in America shopped Change preposition
of people
their
necessities less often Change preposition
for their
while
28% of them preferred to do it a few times a month. Afterwards, there were 20% shoppers
that never had Change preposition
of shoppers
an
experience Correct article usage
apply
to buy
things Change the verb form
buying
in
Change preposition
on
online
platform whilst there were 15% Correct article usage
the online
people
Change preposition
of people
buying
Wrong verb form
bought
it
weekly.
Correct pronoun usage
them
In addition
, all, monthly, and less frequent online shoppers like to purchase goods by
virtual money in physical Change preposition
with
store
(above 60%, 50%, Fix the agreement mistake
stores
80
%) than in e-commerce (above 30%, 40%, Correct word choice
and 80
10
%), respectively. Meanwhile, weekly online buyers prefer buying with digital money in online Correct word choice
and 10
store
(above 60%) than in offline Fix the agreement mistake
stores
store
(above 30%).Fix the agreement mistake
stores
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words store with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
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