in some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. why might this be the case? do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

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Nowadays, many
people
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are aiming to buy their own
house
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instead
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of living in a rented one. In
this
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essay, I will mention a possible motive behind
this
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action.
Also
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, I will explain why it might be considered a negative situation. The desire to purchase a
house
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in most
people
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is driven by what is called the success scale. Currently, in order to be entitled as a successful person, you have to own a
house
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, maybe two, a car, and have a great sum of money in your bank account.
In other words
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, the more possessions you have, the more successful you will be.
This
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concept and narrow definition of success create some kind of social pressure on
people
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that pushes them to
fulfill
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fulfil
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these new standards and prove themselves as wealthy successful
people
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. Buying a
house
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at first look seems like a dream come true, but I believe that it carries some hidden downsides. Regarding work and study, the fact that being tied to a certain place after buying a home and settling on it might narrow the chances of getting good job opportunities or might miss an excellent university programme providing that sometimes commuting is not a practical and convenient solution for a long time.
Additionally
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, unfortunately, some
people
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seek some illegal ways
such
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as bribery to collect more money in a few time to be financially able to buy a
house
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.
This
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will result in a deterioration or even complete absence in the moral values of the
people
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. In conclusion, owning a
house
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is becoming a dream for many
people
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because of the effect of the
mis leading
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misleading
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concept of success,
as a result
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,
people
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may miss great jobs and study offers or become victims of their greed.
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that ideas are logically organized throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, but could be more explicitly stated for a stronger overall structure.
task achievement
Make sure to provide more relevant specific examples and develop the ideas further to achieve a more comprehensive response to the task.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • renting
  • importance
  • sense of security
  • stability
  • financial investment
  • asset
  • customize
  • decorate
  • belonging
  • community
  • potential
  • future generations
  • long-term
  • cost advantage
  • control
  • living space
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