The table below give information about Favorite Pastimes in different countries.

#information #pastimes #countries

The table compares data about favourable leisure activities for people aged 30-50 in 8 distinct countries.

Overall

, reading, watching TV and participating in

hobbies

pop

are

Change the verb form

show examples

popular in some countries,

whereas

going to the beach and sleeping were the least preferable ones.

Additionally

, no one is interested in going to the beach in Canada.

To begin

, in Australia, 65% of people enjoy watching TV, representing the highest number in the chat, followed by

hobbies

and sports, at 45% and 30%, respectively.

Similarly

, in Canada and the USA, the most enjoyable pastime is watching TV,

while

in Korea it is

hobbies

(45%) and reading(60%). China

also

selected reading over other things, at 60%,

as well as

engaging in

hobbies

, at 50%.

On the other hand

, only 2% of Canadians like sleeping and just 3%, listen to music, illustrating one of the least favourite activities. In China, no one enjoys music, same as Koreans and Australians, at 2% and 5%, respectively.

Additionally

, sleeping is

also

not admired by Australians (4%), Koreans (4%), China(5%) and the USA (2%), but chosen by 20% of English people.

Submitted by innakireeva0101 on Thu Oct 19 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "additionally, also".

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words hobbies with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

182 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The table below give information about Favorite Pastimes in different countries.

Some people think that one of the best ways to solve environmental problems is to increase the cost of fuel. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people choose to eat no meat or fish. They believe that this is not only better for their own health but also benefits the world as a whole. Discuss this view and give your own opinion.

In many countries, people throw away a lot of food from restaurants and shops. Why do you think people waste food in this way? What can be done to reduce the amount of food thrown away?

Some school leavers go traveling or work for a period of time instead of going directly to university. Do you think this has more advantages, or disadvantages on their study？

Many parents complain about violence promoted to their children through video games, TV programs and other medias. Why is it happening? What can be the solution for it? Give your opinion and include relevant examples.