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Writing Samples
Band 7

The bar chart represents the number of travellers using three main airports in New York City from 1995 to 2000.

The bar chart represents the number of travellers using three main airports in New York City from 1995 to 2000.
#bar #travellers #three #airports #york #city
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The bar chart represents the number of
travellers
Use synonyms
 using
three
Correct article usage
the three
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 main
airports
Use synonyms
 in New York City from 1995 to 2000. In the supplied chart it is clearly observed that the John F. Kennedy
Use synonyms
airport
Capitalize word
Airport
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 used to be the most popular
airport
Use synonyms
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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New York which lost its commonness throughout the 1990s,
however
Linking Words
, the other ones held their position steadily. The Newark
airport
Use synonyms
 accounted
the
Change preposition
for the
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 least amount of people travelling, to be more precise less than 10
million
Use synonyms
 in 1995
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
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 with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
42
million
Use synonyms
 in 2000. As shown in the illustration by the time of 2000s
airports
Use synonyms
 became more common,
thus
Linking Words
 there was a significant upsurge in the proportion of airplane
travellers
Use synonyms
 and all three of
provided
Correct article usage
the provided
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airports
Use synonyms
 displayed a high range of passengers going up from 40
million
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 and reaching a peak with final 70
million
Use synonyms
 in the LaGuardia
airport
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. In 1996 and 1997
airports
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 like John F. Kennedy and LaGuardia had more than 30
million
Use synonyms
travellers
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 using their airplanes but
this
Linking Words
 proportion in the Newark
airport
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 raised sharply from 20 to 40
million
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.
By contrast
Linking Words
, in 1998 and 1999 the LaGuardia
airport
Use synonyms
 held the position of the most well-known
airport
Use synonyms
 in NY collecting more than 45
million
Use synonyms
travellers
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by dnm.best on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words travellers, airports, airport, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "represents" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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