IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The pie chart illustrates what type of transport is mostly used,while the table provides reasons for car using in Edmonton.

The pie chart illustrates what type of transport is mostly used,while the table provides reasons for car using in Edmonton.
The pie chart illustrates what type of transport is mostly used,
while
Linking Words
 the table provides reasons for car
using
Replace the word
use
show examples
 in Edmonton.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is evident that the vast majority of people choose cars and LRT,
while
Linking Words
 the highest percentages of car use seem to be related to commute to work and business already having hundred
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
 together . As can be seen from the pie chart, the majority
is belong
Change the verb form
belongs
show examples
 to just under half of those sectors ,but taxes and buses
accounts
Change the verb form
account
show examples
 for a small proportion of
those illustration
Change the determiner
that illustration
those illustrations
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
,
when
Rephrase
apply
show examples
Light Rail Transit made
used
Replace the word
use
show examples
 of 35
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
 of all parts ,
although
Linking Words
 having
fractional
Correct article usage
a fractional
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falling
Replace the word
fall
show examples
 in percentages
comparing
Change the form of the verb
compared
show examples
 to automobiles . With regard to the table,the noticeable difference
among to
Change preposition
between
show examples
 taking children to school and business
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 is
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
going to work.The considerable differences
shopping
Change preposition
between shopping
show examples
 and leisure activities
are have
Change the verb form
have
show examples
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 numbers ,
also
Linking Words
 comprised
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the lowest figures (15%) .

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "illustrates" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "difference" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 4 times.
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