Some people rely too much on doctors instead of taking care of their own health. They think all health problems can just be 'fixed' by visiting doctors. What problems could this approach to healthcare cause and how might they be resolved?

#people #doctors #care #health #approach #healthcare

These days,

people

rely on doctors

instead

of their own in regard to their own

health

. They think that when it comes to

health

problems

, visiting a

doctor

can cure their diseases in an instant. In reality,

that is

not how it can be solved. In

this

essay, the writer will elaborate more on the

problems

that may arise in the

healthcare

sector and its solutions. One of the

problems

that may arise in the

healthcare

industry is that both hospital and clinic doctors will not have and spend much time with the

patients

who most need their help,

such

as emergency

patients

and surgery

patients

This

can impact the hospitals' and clinics' reputations for managing and accepting their

patients

. To resolve

this

matter,

people

need to be educated on how to take responsibility for their own

health

such

as resting for 8 hours per day, eating healthy food, and exercising one to two times each week.

Additionally

, if

people

visit a

doctor

to 'solve' their well-being

problems

they should be expected to pay the doctors to solve

problems

which they created through their own lifestyle choices.

Furthermore

, visiting a

doctor

for something trivial does not harm their

health

or time.

On the other hand

, if

people

visited their

doctor

more regularly, more well-being issues could be detected early and treated before they become serious. In conclusion,

although

the

problems

in the

healthcare

sector may bring drawbacks to the

healthcare

institutions, it is far more important to insight

people

on how to take care of themselves especially when they have unhealthy lifestyles.

Submitted by seyyuhhh on Sun Oct 22 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

262 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Dependency
Personal responsibility
Healthcare
Doctors
Over-reliance
Delayed diagnoses
Missed diagnoses
Excessive reliance
Medical procedures
Healthcare costs
Proactive steps
Education
Awareness programs
Primary healthcare services
Preventive healthcare
Chronic conditions
Collaborating
Personalized health plans
Self-care

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Some people rely too much on doctors instead of taking care of their own health. They think all health problems can just be 'fixed' by visiting doctors. What problems could this approach to healthcare cause and how might they be resolved?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interest and whether they are marries od single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Other disagree. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In their advertising business nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative devlopment? write at least 250 words.

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both views and give your opinion.