Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
In contemporary society, self-treatment has become a prevalent phenomenon among all groups of people. I have observed that in many cases, individuals tend to rely on their own knowledge or traditional solutions rather than visiting a specialist.
Although
for minor illnesses, these practices may yield pleasurable results, in severe cases, they can lead to irreparable damage.
To begin
with, a large number of people have a tendency to address their health problems based on their personal experiences. For example
, drinking herbal tea to alleviate headaches, using almond oil for backaches, and consuming ginger for allergies have become commonplace and are often effective for those who suffer from these ailments. Furthermore
, for ailments with short-term symptoms
, a simple online search can provide efficient solutions and increase public knowledge. As a result
, we could expect a more scientifically informed society.
On the other hand
, without qualifications and a solid scientific foundation, these self-treatments can lead to fatal consequences. In other words
, if the symptoms
persist for more than two days, seeking the advice of a medical specialist is highly recommended; otherwise
, they may result in irreparable harm. To illustrate this
, by looking at the news, it can be concluded that many heart patients did not pay significant attention to signs of their disease, including chest or neck pain, which ultimately cost them their lives. Moreover
, health is a precious gift, and it is crucial to pay appreciable attention to it rather than ignoring potentially hazardous symptoms
.
In conclusion, I believe that for common ailments like colds, which exhibit short-term symptoms
, consulting books or the internet may be beneficial for the
Correct article usage
apply
overall
well-being. However
, in acute situations, making an appointment with a qualified doctor should be considered a necessitySubmitted by golriiz23 on
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Task Response
You were able accurately respond to the prompt and effectively communicate your viewpoint with clear and relevant supporting points. However, work on covering all parts of the task more equally to achieve a higher score in task achievement.
Coherence and Cohesion
The structure of the essay is logically organized with a clear introduction and conclusion, as well as appropriate topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph. The main points are further supported by elaboration and examples. There is good use of cohesive devices, but ensure paragraphs flow smoothly from one to the next.
Lexical Resource
The range of vocabulary is impressive and mostly accurate. Be aware of occasional inappropriate language use. Always aim to use language that is appropriate to the context.
Grammar
Your use of complex and varied sentence structures is admirable. However, there were a few minor grammatical errors and occasional inaccuracy. Please double-check your use of punctuation and be especially mindful of using articles correctly.
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