Some people think that music plays an important role in society. Others think it is simply a form of entertainment. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
Many
people
believe that music
plays an essential role in society, while
other people
say it is just for an
entertainment Correct article usage
apply
purpose
. Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
This
essay will discuss both views of the statement in the following paragraphs.
The main reason why music
is important because
it can be transformed into an identity of a community. Add a missing verb
is because
People
with similar taste
Fix the agreement mistake
tastes
of
Change preposition
in
music
will gather to share information related to specific music
genre
. Fix the agreement mistake
genres
Additionally
, music
can also
contribute to the culture in
a country. Change preposition
of
For instance
, dangdut is well-known as an authentic music
from Indonesia. Moreover
, music
can heal people
. Research showed that specific wave sounds have positive effects to
the brain, Change preposition
on
thus
some people
use music
as a therapy. Calming and relaxing songs can be used when people
feel a lot of pressure because of their busy live
.
On the other side, not all Replace the word
lives
people
have huge
interest in Add an article
a huge
music
. This
is all because music
is not teach
in schools as a mandatory study subject when they Change the form of the verb
taught
were
young. In school, students learn how to play an instrument and song through student Wrong verb form
are
club houses
. Correct your spelling
clubhouses
This
leads a
perception that Change preposition
to a
music
is not essential
thing to learn in Add an article
an essential
live
, Replace the word
life
people
just focus on other aspects (e.g., sport
and science) and only use Fix the agreement mistake
sports
music
as one of
Change preposition
apply
entertainment
Correct article usage
the entertainment
tool
.
In conclusion, in my Fix the agreement mistake
tools
perspective
Add a comma
perspective,
music
is essential
part Add an article
an essential
in
society as an identity and it can contribute to the culture. Change preposition
of
Music
can heal people
who need because
of the calming sensation that Correct pronoun usage
it because
produced
by specific sounds. Add a missing verb
is produced
However
, many people
do not have interest
Add an article
the interest
an interest
of
Change preposition
in
music
because they believe it is not an important thing to be mastered. They just focus to learn
aspects that are crucial for Change preposition
on learning
live
.Replace the word
life
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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