Many people today prefer socializing online rather than socializing in local communities. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

These days the majority of people would rather interact with others by social media than connect face to face in real life with them. In my opinion, online communication is beneficial for numerous individuals so we can overlook its drawbacks. In
this
essay, I will consider both sides of
this
subject. With developing technology, especially after widespread COVID-19, the public all around the world prefers to do their work and meetings online
due to
it is more convenient and faster than going to a place.
Moreover
, you don'
t
have to use public transportation or private vehicles and waste plenty of time in the busy and crowded underground, traffic in the streets, and a bus which is packed with lots of folks.
Furthermore
, people can find new
friends
who have various nationalities in various countries so they can learn about each other's cultures, foods, traditions,
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
show examples
, religions, and whatever they really care about,
consequently
myriad information can be gained.
Finally
, we can be aware of our families and
friends
at once whenever miss them just by using the internet and it is almost cheap and more beneficial for those who don'
t
have enough time.
Whereas
, utilizing these facilities needs to internet connection and if you don'
t
have one, you can not be able to do your activities and it causes stress and anxiety.
In addition
, It can not be used as an alternative to face-to-face communication because lack of physical interaction might lead humans to mental issues. In my opinion, eye-to-eye contact and engaging in conversation with relatives, classmates, and
friends
in real life can strengthen relationships, and individuals feel closer to each other than online conversation.
For example
, a couple of years ago I had to connect with my parent and my
friends
through the network, after a
while
I deeply felt alone and my life became so boring. In conclusion, It is obvious why people prefer to socialize online, and we can'
t
turn on blind eye to it.
However
, based on my own experiences it wouldn'
t
be efficient in the long term.
Submitted by kmibehnaz98 on

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task response
Make sure to address all aspects of the task. Provide a balanced discussion of the advantages and disadvantages of socializing online. Consider the impact on relationships, mental health, and overall effectiveness of online interactions.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to the structure of your essay. It lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. Make sure to introduce your topic and provide a summary of your main points in the conclusion.
lexical resource
You have used a good range of vocabulary in your essay. However, try to vary your word choices more and use more precise and specific language to convey your ideas.
grammatical range
Your grammar is generally accurate, but there are a few errors throughout the essay. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement, verb tense consistency, and sentence structure.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • socializing
  • local communities
  • advantages
  • outweigh
  • disadvantages
  • convenience
  • flexibility
  • connect
  • range of people
  • diverse
  • global communities
  • self-expression
  • creativity
  • communication
  • networking skills
  • lack
  • face-to-face interaction
  • social skills
  • empathy
  • cyberbullying
  • online harassment
  • addiction
  • excessive
  • screen time
  • privacy
  • security concerns
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