IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Millions of dollars are spent on space research every year. Some people argue that the money should spent on improving living standards on Earth. Do you agree or disagree?

#millions #dollars #space #research #year #people #money #standards #earth
The majority of
people
 debate that millions of dollars should be used to improve the quality of life rather than invest in
space
 research. The writer totally disagrees with the statement and will explain why in the following essay.
Firstly
, the role-play of researching
space
 is crucial because of the
space
 knowledge it brings
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
. In recent years, a group of scientists all over the world has been working hard to find suitable
planets
 for global residents can settle there.
As a result
, they took off many satellites and found numerous
planets
 and galaxies having water, oxygen and dirt, which are the foundation of life.
Therefore
, government and
space
 companies will not stop until they ensure
people
 can migrate to other
planets
.
Secondly
, the earth has witnessed a big impact of climate change, global warming and the greenhouse effect which are the consequences of human activities. In many countries, the authorities do lots of activities that affect badly on the environment
such
 as deforestation, constructing more buildings, and using individual vehicles.
As a consequence
, the environment becomes worse, the habitat of animals is destroyed, and
people
 in many nations do not have fresh water to drink. Dealing with
this
 global issue, the government decided to invest money in
space
 research to find suitable habitats for humans can settle.
Moreover
, because the life standard of inhabitants was good enough, the government could concentrate on finding new
planets
 for
people
 to live in. Taking everything into account,
space
 research is necessary because
Change preposition
of
show examples
the development of the country, and
also
play
Correct subject-verb agreement
plays
show examples
 a crucial role in finding a new place for
people
 to live in.
Hence
,
this
 writer has illustrated the importance of researching
space
 in the essay.
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coherence cohesion
Your introduction should clearly state your position on the topic and provide an overview of your main points. Try to make it more engaging and attention-grabbing.
coherence cohesion
Provide a clear and concise conclusion based on your arguments. Summarize your main points and restate your position on the topic.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas and make your essay more varied and sophisticated. Consider using more advanced vocabulary related to space exploration and environmental issues.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to ensure clarity and coherence in your writing. Try to vary your sentence structures and avoid repetitive sentence patterns.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • space exploration
  • scientific discoveries
  • cutting-edge technology
  • pioneering research
  • socio-economic development
  • improved healthcare
  • education
  • poverty alleviation
  • infrastructure
  • balanced approach
  • cost-effective
  • prioritize
  • allocate
  • resources
  • budget
  • investment
  • sustainable development
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