In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

In several countries, most societies believe that it is important to allocate
big
Correct word choice
large
show examples
amounts of money
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
manufacturing new railway tracks for fast trains to connect one city to another. Meanwhile, others think the
government
should use the money to develop existing public
transportation
. In
this
essay, I am going to examine
this
case from both viewpoints in the paragraph below. To start with,
traffic
jams have become one of the big issues in metropolitan cities for a few countries. It is necessary for the
government
to provide more public
transportation
to assist people travel from one place to another. Building new routes for fast trains is the smartest solution to lower the
traffic
jam rates.
For instance
, the highest number of blockages in Jakarta
keep
Change the verb form
keeps
show examples
increasing each year. Many people, especially workers, feel restless dealing with
this
problem. Reflecting on several developed countries,
Indonesian
Correct article usage
the Indonesian
show examples
government
create
Wrong verb form
created
show examples
new lines for fast trains in order to solve the
traffic
jam issues.
On the other hand
, most of the human civilization
feel
Correct subject-verb agreement
feels
show examples
comfortable to utilize public transport.
However
, increasing public transport leads to environmental pollution.
For example
, the capital city of Indonesia, Jakarta, is currently facing bad air quality. It is believed that the main cause is the enormous amount of private and public
transportation
.
This
issue made almost all the workforce and students required to work
as well as
study from their
house
Correct your spelling
homes
show examples
. If the
government
adds more public
transportation
, the index of bad air quality will keep increasing. In conclusion, it is the best strategy to construct new railway lines to make travel easier and reduce
traffic
issues.
However
, the
government
can spend the money to improve existing public transport if the country is not yet densely populated.
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coherence cohesion
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task achievement
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lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary in your essay to enhance your lexical resource.
grammatical range
Pay closer attention to your sentence structure and grammar to improve your grammatical range.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure
  • efficient
  • congestion
  • sustainable
  • environmentally friendly
  • connectivity
  • economic growth
  • public transportation
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