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Band 6.5

people who live in large cities face a range of problems in their daily life. What are the most significant of these problems? How can these problems be tackled?

#people #cities #face #range #life
It is said that the citizens who live in big
cities
 cope with a range of troubles in their everyday lives. The most vital of these problems is the lack of
health
. The thing that can be done to solve
this
 problem is reducing
pollution
.
Pollution
 is the main cause leading to the decrease in
people
's
health
 in big
cities
. There are two main kinds of
pollution
 in urban, they are
air
pollution
 and
light
pollution
.
Air
pollution
 is caused by the exhaust of vehicles and factories.
Air
pollution
 affects human
health
 badly by making them have lung problems like coughing or more seriously lung cancer.
Light
pollution
 is the result of the development of entertainment and advertisement in
cities
, many shops use plenty of LED in order to attract their customers
as well as
 the advertisement.
Light
pollution
 is the top reason for eye diseases and sleeplessness of
people
 in
cities
.
However
, all of these problems can be tackled to improve the
health
 condition of urban
people
. Beginning with
air
pollution
, we can handle public transport to reduce the number of personal vehicles on the road by improving the facilities,
adding
Correct word choice
and adding
show examples
 buses and routes. The factory which exhausts emissions should be fined to reduce the CO2 in the
air
. To deal with
light
pollution
 we are able to ask the government to decrease the
light
 level at night. In conclusion, the
health
 of
people
 in large
cities
 is endangered because of
pollution
, we should do something to cope with
this
.
Submitted by zky1705202 on

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task response
Ensure that all parts of the task are addressed fully, including discussing both the problems faced by people in large cities and providing solutions to these problems.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure a clear logical structure throughout the essay. Make sure each paragraph focuses on one main idea and connects to the overall argument.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary to express ideas more precisely and effectively. Use a variety of sentence structures to convey meaning.
grammatical range
Pay attention to grammatical accuracy. Check for subject-verb agreement, verb tense consistency, and the appropriate use of articles, prepositions, and conjunctions.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • urbanization
  • metropolis
  • commute
  • public transportation
  • gridlock
  • air pollution
  • noise pollution
  • expensive housing
  • exorbitant prices
  • work-life balance
  • recreation areas
  • parks and gardens
  • criminal activities
  • security measures
  • density
  • neighborhood
  • public amenities
  • healthcare facilities
  • educational institutions
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